Endgame
by Maleficent Angel
Summary: A resurrection. A death. And a battle for the survival of Far Far Away. Rated for angst in early chapters and violence in others. Set after Shrek 2. COMPLETE
1. Realising the truth

**I don't own them, but that's not to say I wouldn't like to if the Shrek team feel like providing me with some of the rights such that I make a profit from the DVD sales. Nah, who am I kidding. 'Taint never gonna happen. All characters and movie events belong to Dreamworks, I am lowly scum, please don't sue me, etc.**

**(ahem)**

**This fanfic is set directly after the end of Shrek 2. Spoilers for the end credits if you haven't already watched them all the way through (shame on you!).**

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The party ended late, with a lone donkey belting out "King of the Road" in recognition of the fact he was going to need a new job to support his mutant offspring. Shrek and Fiona, deciding that it was far too embarrassing to dance to good old country music, had slipped off to their room an hour earlier. Donkey, together with Dragon and their hybrid children, left the castle courtyard and headed for one of the farms to spend their first night together as a family.

Finally the courtyard of the castle of Far Far Away was left silent and empty. A breeze loosened one of the bright ribbons from the stage and it fluttered to the ground next to a forlorn pair of broken glasses and a wand. The movement of the ribbon against the wand caused a few sparks to shoot from the end, but the wind tore the ribbon away quickly and it carried on its journey through the moonlit sky.

A figure moved in the shadows, drawing the eye to the stage. A young man in silver spandex walked out of the wings and down the steps from the stage to the courtyard. He looked around, then spied the glasses and wand. He walked over to them quickly. As he walked into the moonlight the name "Kyle" could be seen emblazoned across his chest in silver satin.

Kyle kneeled next to the items. Carefully, he picked up the glasses and put them safely into his pocket. He picked up the wand and turned it over gently in his hands. Lost in thought, the young man's face slowly turned from thoughtful to distraught. Without a word, he held the wand against his chest and started to cry softly.


	2. The New Accounts Manager

The new Accounts Manager at the potions factory stared in horror at the columns of numbers in front of his eyes. A month had passed since the demise of the Fairy Godmother and already he had made a monumental cock-up of the balance sheets. Fairy Godmother, being rather good with profit margins and price-fixing, had ensured the factory always made a decent turnaround and was always in profit. Despite her huge salary in comparison to the workers in the factory, her personal control of stock, sales and THE BOOKS had enabled her to keep tight control of the finances of the business.

The new Accounts Manager did not measure up the Fairy Godmother in any business respect. He did not understand which raw ingredients were needed for potions, so had delegated that responsibility to Jerome. The new Accounts Manager was also incapable of understanding invoices and returns and in desperation had drafted a team of workers to work in the new "shipping department." On top of this, most of the highest priced potions could no longer be made as they needed someone with magical ability to mix them and no one had yet been found to replace Fairy Godmother. As this included all of the effective love potions the drop-off in profits was crippling the company, as was the decline in quality of the potions they could still make due to the fact there was no longer a fairy to assess the quality of the finished product. He sighed and looked back at the numbers, columns jumbled, "monies in" blending half way down the page into "monies out." He looked back at the bank statement from that morning. It was so much easier to understand, but somehow that didn't help him much. At the top of another mash of numbers, the bank statement declared that the company was now in overdraft, something FGM Inc. had not encountered since it was first established.

Sighing, the new Accounts Manager played with his long, tangled hair and sat back. He was seated in the old office; the Fairy Godmother's desk in front of him covered in paperwork. He stood and walked to the office door, took one look around the office, then exited to the reception area. Jerome was working hard, fielding calls from frustrated clients who wanted to return potions that had failed. Far worse in Jerome's opinion were the rich clients who demanded to speak to the Fairy Godmother _right now _and who couldn't accept that this was in fact impossible regardless of how much money they offered. Not that he hadn't considered donning a purple wig and a dress when one noble offered enough money to allow him to retire immediately after the meeting. In between calls, frantically covering the crystal ball on his desk to prevent any more incoming, he waved to the accounts manger.

"Good morning, sir. Is there anything I can do for you? This came – I signed for it." Jerome thrust a long, narrow package at the accounts manager and turned back to the crystal ball. He took a deep breath to steady himself and uncovered it, releasing a flood of incoming calls.

The new Accounts Manager started to open the package in his hands. It was the new nameplate for Fairy Godmother's desk – no, _his _desk. The brass plate was decorated in swirled italics.

"Managing Director, Accounts Manager, Public Relations Officer and Head of Personnel," was scrawled across the top of the plate whilst underneath, in larger font, was engraved "Prince Charming." He couldn't help feeling that his mother's plaque had said so much more with the two simple words "Fairy Godmother." Feeling angry at the state of the company since he had inherited it a month earlier, he tossed the nameplate idly onto a chair as he left for what he hoped would be a calming walk.

Charming tried to run his fingers through his hair, but found that the tangled mess on top of his head was resisting his efforts. Were his mother still here, she'd have insisted he had a haircut at least a week ago. He was sure he was losing hair – he'd never actually had to cope with money before, 'mummy' dealing with that more complicated part of his life. As far as Charming was concerned, outwitting evil tyrants and fighting dragons was enough of a complication without trying to factor in a mortgage and savings account. He stormed off across the bridge, picked up a stick and attacked a few helpless blades of grass. His bad mood exacerbated by memories of his mother, he sat down under a tree.

Mother. He'd never really thought about her leaving him until it had already happened. He had always assumed that because she was a fairy, she would have a longer life than him and would therefore always be there for him. She should have been there for him, he thought bitterly, if it was not for that bloody ogre and that ridiculous princess. An unbidden thought at the back of his mind nagged that it was technically his mother's idea to try to split up the royal couple and that had she just allowed them to live happily ever after and not tried to kill them, she would still be here with him. Charming shook that thought away. He was cursed, from his point of view, with a conscience that was more prominent than his mother's and now it was screaming that she had, in fact, got exactly what she deserved. While Fairy Godmother was capable of admitting (to Charming) that some of her actions were extreme, she would have had no qualms about continuing with her plans until Charming was king of Far Far Away and had been guaranteed a 'happily ever after,' regardless of how many people were harmed in the making of this happy ending. Charming remembered a conversation years ago, when she'd explained that a conscience and feelings could sometimes be your own worst enemies.

He turned his thoughts back to her, trying to remember how she'd run the factory, trying to work out what he had done since that was so wrong. He was far from useless – he would never have survived his numerous quests if that had been the case. The endless bureaucracy of the factory was depressing Charming – he preferred the simple, kill-or-be-killed world of the hero, a world where someone would thank you for saving them from a dragon, not sue you if you spoiled their dress while doing so. He was starting to hate Far Far Away, especially now that he had no mother to buffer him from the negative effects of the so-called modern world.

Charming got up and wandered back to the cottage, skirting around it to the garden he'd built to remember his mother by. There had always been some flowers around the back of the cottage, but Charming had decided to make a memorial for his mother at the factory and, given that he had been robbed of the chance to give her a grave, had turned the simple flower beds into an elaborate rose garden. He fondly remembered her wandering through the rose garden at the castle and knew she would have loved this place. Roses had always been her favourite. Unbidden, tears welled up in Charming's eyes. The pressures of work faded as he felt the pain of losing the only parent he had known building again in his heart. Hidden from view and alone with his thoughts, Charming knelt next to a large climbing rose and started to weep uncontrollably. He turned his face to the sky and let out an anguished cry.

"Mummy!"


	3. Life as usual

Donkey woke from a pleasant dream, one in which he had been frolicking carefree in a meadow and never had to think about getting up until he felt like it. As he wearily opened his eyes, he saw Dragon sleeping on the other side of the barn, just visible through the early morning gloom. Now if I just move quietly enough, he thought, maybe, just maybe I can get out before...

"Dada, dada, dada!" screeched one of his babies. He wasn't sure if that was Francoise or Rasputin, but it wouldn't be long now before the other five woke up. Within seconds, Donkey was flat on the floor, his children piled on top of him, all shouting "Dada!" Dragon groaned grumpily then looked pitifully at Donkey, aware that he would need to go to work in a moment. Donkey worked as a tour guide to the rich and famous of Far Far Away by day and as a pizza delivery donkey at night. On his rare days off, their mutual friend Puss would baby-sit to allow Dragon and Donkey to go out on a date. Their dates were few and far between however, Puss usually needing some time to recover from babysitting duties. Last time one of the girls had eaten his trademark hat and the couple had arrived home to find the babies flying around the barn while Puss stared wide-eyed at the remains of a feather, lip quivering. It had taken the combined efforts of Shrek, Fiona and Donkey a whole week before Puss could stop shaking long enough to mew plaintively, "My Hat!!!" Fiona had found a suitable replacement within hours, but Donkey found himself unable to ask Puss to baby-sit again. Maybe next week, he thought. It's been three weeks since the hat got eaten, and it will be four weeks by the end of next week. He can't hold a grudge that long can he?

Dragon called the kids off their father and, after some considerable effort, fed them and growled them to sleep as Donkey got ready for work. She plodded over to the door of their barn and rubbed her snout against Donkey's as he left. Dragon purred a goodbye and smiled at Donkey.

"See you later, little lady!" he brayed, bounding off towards the city. As he made his way to work, Donkey thought back over the last few months since the ball where he had discovered he was father to six unique offspring. The months had been filled with work but Donkey had really not minded – he enjoyed working as a guide and the crazy world of pizza delivery was practically made for him. Pounding top speed through the streets of Far Far Away's capital city was always interesting, but add into that mix the nightlife of the city and a donkey on a mission to deliver within thirty minutes (or your money back!) and you could easily satisfy Donkey's need for adventure.

Donkey slowed as he approached the city and started dancing to a tune in his head. Today he would be guiding a group of tourists around the sights of the city – a walking tour around the castle, shops and famous houses of famous people. After that he'd stop for lunch, pick up his second group at the tourist office and take them on a shopping tour. Donkey had become almost as famous as the city itself – where else could you be shown around a city by a talking animal? He was so lost in his thoughts, he didn't see a shadow following him. In fact, until a flash of ginger spun in front of his face and a rapier was held to his nose, he didn't see or hear Puss in Boots at all.

"A-ha!" said Puss, smiling behind the sword.

"Hey man, what you at with the sword and all?" replied Donkey. Puss grinned and sheathed the rapier. He threw a mock salute at Donkey.

"Good morning signor! How is your charming lady today?"

"What charming la... Oh dragon? She's fine. So are the kids. Uh, sorry about the, um, you know," Donkey couldn't quite say hat, embarrassed as he was by his children's behaviour. He pointed vaguely upwards with one hoof. Puss ran his right hand along the brim of the new hat and laughed.

"Don't worry about it! When will you be requiring my services again?"

"You want to baby-sit?" asked Donkey, amazed by the feline's tenacity.

"Si! I have some ideas that may help me to control them. Besides, it's fun." Puss shuffled his feet and looked down, letting a softer side of his personality show through his cool, assassin exterior. He enjoyed playing with Donkey's children and had often told his friend that he hoped to have children of his own one-day. Donkey laughed.

"Hey – how 'bout next Wednesday? Me and Dragon can go to that new tequila bar on Broadstreet!"

"It would be a pleasure! But for now, I must get back to my patrol!" Puss jumped into the air and within moments he was out of side, hidden somewhere he could watch the road into the city and keep it safe from danger. Donkey shook his head, smiled and continued into the city. Puss watched him go from under a bush. Unlike Donkey, Puss did not find his job wholly satisfying. There was something wrong from Puss' point of view with stopping a merchant's carriage, asking for his papers, then allowing it to pass _with the gold still inside the carriage._ On top of this, no-one ever tried to invade the city, so he never had a chance to duel with enemies. He was becoming bored with guard-duty. On the plus side, many noblewomen travelling along the road found a talking, swash-buckling cat too cute to resist and he was frequently fussed and cuddled, often receiving kitty treats as well. Must watch the kitty treats, he thought. I'm not getting as much exercise as I used to. Puss yawned and rested his head on his paws, lazily watching the road for signs of danger.

"Me-ow," he whispered softly, before starting to purr in the warmth of the summer sun.


	4. Happy Families

Lillian looked up from her collection of paperwork and frowned at Harold. He seemed far too happy hopping around the floor, playing chess with Shrek with only a moderate amount of physical difficulty. Fiona was trying to help her mother as best she could, but she had only been in the country six months and did not understand the complexities of the Far Far Away political system yet. Lillian frowned and read through the latest pile of papers relating to taxes, planning permission and trading standards. She scowled at a "Farbucks" letterhead and scrawled "Rejected" over the planning application. Satisfied that she had saved the town from complete destruction by Farbucks, she stood and walked over to the chessboard Shrek and Harold were playing on. Irritated by the fact she had received no help from her husband all morning (he had claimed frogs couldn't read) and stressed that she had been disturbed time and time again (by Shrek's continued shouts of frustration as Harold repeatedly put him into checkmate game after game) she took her revenge. Leaning over Shrek's shoulder, she moved his knight forward, putting Harold into check. Crossing to Harold's side, she performed a quick castle move. Three moves later and Shrek's pieces had checkmated Harold's pieces, ending the game. Both players gasped – Harold for having lost, and Shrek for not seeing how he could have won, both for Lillian ruining the game. Lillian smiled happily and went out to the balcony to look down at the kingdom below her. There was a soft breeze this morning and the land was shrouded in a grey mist. Autumn would soon be over, ushering in winter and the all-too perfect snowfall that blessed Far Far Away every year. Lillian sighed contentedly – it looked like another wonderful afternoon was on its way. She decided to take a break from her official work – she _was_ the Queen after all – and turned to the rest of her family.

"Let's go out for lunch! We have not been out in town for so long!"

"We went to the theatre last week!" protested Harold, who still hadn't got used to appearing as a frog in public. The pair glared at each other, Lillian winning the battle of wills. Less than an hour later, Shrek, Fiona, Lillian and Harold were sitting in the fanciest restaurant in town and ordering their starters.

The meal was exquisite – everything cooked to perfection. Shrek remembered to mind his manners and not belch at the table and the headwaiter remembered not to talk about frogs' legs. As they were walking back to the castle, Shrek had time to compare how lucky he was now to his life before Fiona. He had a wife, he was now joint-heir to a kingdom, he lived in a palace and, best of all, no-one threw pitchforks at him anymore. I'm on top of the world, he thought happily. As they passed the apothecary, Fiona whispered to her mother and ran in to the shop. Moments later she returned, clutching a small packet.

"What have you bought?" asked Shrek.

"Oh, just some... women's things, Shrek. Nothing to worry about," replied Fiona.

"Oh, okay," he answered quickly, embarrassed by his own question and Fiona's answer. The rest of the journey passed without incident, Fiona and her mother occasionally exchanging knowing glances while Harold and Shrek chatted about the merits of serving snails in restaurants.

That night, with the fog clearing, Harold asked Shrek if he would take him riding the next morning – one of the few pursuits he missed now he was a frog. Shrek had planned to spend the day with Fiona, but thought a day away from the castle may be good for him so agreed wholeheartedly. After all, it was just a ride in the woods. What could possibly go wrong?


	5. Losing their souls

Shrek guided the white Arab mare through the forest and down to a lily pond. He was far too large to ride the horse, so guided the king's mount with its reins while Harold hopped up from the saddle to the horse's head occasionally to better view the world around him. Having lived as a human for so long, Harold was finding it difficult to get used to looking at the world at six inches from the floor again. He had loved horse riding as a human and had often ridden out into these woods with Lillian when they were younger. As Shrek approached the pond, Harold jumped off the horse and headed into the water, welcoming the feel of the cold water against his drying skin. Of all the family, Shrek seemed to best understand that, as a frog, the king needed to keep moist – his frog's skin drying in the heat of the palace. Lillian had bought an elaborate child's bath for Harold to swim in inside the royal apartments, but it just wasn't the same as a pond. Harold kicked twice more and jumped onto the bank.

"Ready to go home Shrek?" he croaked. Shrek picked up Harold and placed him carefully onto the horse's back.

"Right you are, dad, how about we go back through the main gate and surprise Puss?"

Ten minutes later, Shrek and Harold were approaching the main road when a streak of orange sped passed them and disappeared into the woods. They heard a rustle of leaves, as though the streak had turned around, then it returned, equally as fast as it had disappeared. Puss, out of breath, started to explain.

"Boss! Your majesty! Do not go that way – I was ah, on my way to get reinforcements," he panted, not convincing anyone, "it's not safe!"

"I'll be the judge of that! After all, I am an ogre you know!" said Shrek. "Where's the trouble Puss?" Puss swallowed nervously.

"The main road," he answered, drawing his sword. "Your majesty, you must trust me on this – stay away from there! Let me bring the guards!" The king shook his head and Puss was forced to admit defeat. When Shrek started creeping slowly towards the direction Puss had run from, the cat sighed and followed the ogre forward, leading the king's horse at a safe distance.

Shrek emerged from the undergrowth cautiously, looking up the main road to Puss' usual stopping point. A farm cart was at the side of the road, the horse grazing lazily at the roadside verge. Puss arrived at Shrek's side and Shrek noticed that he was shaking ever so slightly.

"Harold, maybe you should wait here, we'll check this out." The pair sneaked forward, waiting for any surprises. Shrek peered over the side of the cart at its contents and laughed at what he saw.

"Puss – you could have just said there was someone to see me," he shook his head. "Hey Gingy, how are things?" He looked back into the cart where Gingy, the three blind mice and the Big Bad Wolf were sitting watching him, Wolf fussing with the hem of his travelling nightgown as though he wasn't quite sure what it was. Shrek sensed that something was not quite right here.

"Back off boss!" warned Puss. Shrek nodded silently in agreement. The travelling companions were not greeting him, chatting or arguing as was usual for them. They were watching Shrek impassively and there seemed to be something sinister behind their emotionless eyes. At the bottom of the cart, a broken mirror glinted in the sunlight. Shrek recognised the mirror's frame and glanced back at the occupants of the cart, feeling now the terror that had struck Puss. The five friends were staring blankly at Shrek, soulless eyes looking through him and threatening him at the same time. Shrek backed away from the cart.

"I tried to threaten them into talking boss, and they all turned on me!"

"Why did you threaten them?"

"Look at them!" mewed Puss. "Mirror was still in one piece when I stopped the cart – he tried to tell me to back off and they smashed him!" Puss shook his head, "it's like they are under a spell, signor."

"Puss, you take the king forward and into the city. Get the guards to come out and meet me." Puss saluted and ran to Harold, quickly guiding the horse forward while explaining to the king what exactly was going on.

Shrek turned his back on the cart and gently urged the carthorse onwards, sweat forming on the back of his neck as he tried not to turn and face his former friends. Occasionally he turned his head and was always greeted with the same sight – the five were now hanging over the front of the cart, staring at the back of Shrek's head with the same blank expressions. It was with some relief that Shrek greeted the forward guard sent to meet him. Two guards carefully lifted Gingy out of the cart, triggering him to start fighting their hands viciously to gain his freedom. Gingy failed to break free and was quickly pushed into a sack. More disturbing in Shrek's view was the behaviour of Wolf and the three blind mice – they were simply waiting patiently until it was their turn to fight. He guessed that Puss had threatened all of the occupants simultaneously with his sword – there was no way they would have attacked him otherwise. He would also swear that the mice could see, even if they didn't seem to react to anything. There was something unnerving about the way they stared impassively at him, bursting into violent kicks and bites once picked up. The five were placed into the castle dungeons for their own safety until a cure could be found.

It was late before a plan of action was finally decided upon. Harold and Lillian sent out messages to all magical creatures within the country, demanding they attend a magical council the next day. The guards around the castle were doubled and the gates to the city were closed for the first time in a hundred years. Fiona watched guards patrol the city walls and saw archers taking their positions in towers. Torches had been lit around the perimeter to allow guards to see any movement outside the walls. Fiona shivered and felt Shrek wrap his arms around her protectively. Neither she nor Far Far Away would sleep easily tonight.


	6. The council meeting

**With apologies to Simon the Sorcerer fans...**

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The newly assembled magical council sat around a large table in the main hall. Harold, Lillian, Shrek and Fiona were sat at the head, Donkey and Puss at the other end of the table. A few senior soldiers from the army sat around the table, interspersed with the magical creatures and beings called by the monarchs to attend. There were elves, talking animals, goblins and tree spirits. Most importantly of all, three fairies had arrived from a neighbouring kingdom – Flora, Fauna and Merryweather. They had often helped Far Far Away in the past, but the need for their being constantly in the kingdom had been reduced by the presence of the Fairy Godmother in recent years so they had stayed away. Besides which, Fairy Godmother had hated competition. It had been common for the different creatures to fight over differences in how they would use their magic – the fairies helping humans, the elves tricking humans and playing practical jokes on them. Today, however, they sat discussing Shrek's old friends and trying to work out how to cure them. The three fairies were huddled together, frantically arguing over some point they did not seem to want to share. Within moments however, their argument had reached screeching level. 

"And I say that Simon Debaal was killed years ago!" shouted Merryweather.

"But he always attacked like this!" shouted back Flora.

"He's dead!"

"How do we know for sure?"

"Surely we could at least find out? Test one of the victims to find the magical signature," interrupted Fauna, once again splitting up her sisters' argument. She was the designated peacemaker of the family, the middle daughter who acted as the buffer between the controlling Flora and the hot-headed Merryweather. Shrek vaguely remembered the three from the days of Lord Farquaad, when they had been forced to live in his swamp. Everyone else knew them as Sleeping Beauty's fairy godmothers who had helped defeat the evil witch Carrabosse.

"Magical signature?" asked Shrek.

"Every fairy, witch, wizard or warlock leaves a mark when they perform a spell – it is unique to them alone," answered Fauna. "If we can find the mark on one of your little friends we should be able to find out who put the spell on them."

"Do it. Now. Guards – fetch the gingerbread man! And while they're fetching the boy, one of you is going to tell us who Simon Debaal is," said Harold, his tone brooking no arguments. The fairies exchanged glances, Flora stepping forward onto the table and waving her wand into the air. A sphere of light formed above the table, an image of a city slowly forming inside it.

"May I present Linavia, a proud and beautiful city that died thirty years ago. First a few people started acting strangely – they were found wandering outside the city, unable to speak, unable to feed themselves. Their families held them close – tried to help them. One day, a young man found his wife outside the gates, wandering aimlessly like the others. When she wouldn't answer, he shook her to get a response. She turned violent – tearing him apart. He was the first to die – there were many others. Every hostile reaction to one of the cursed led to them becoming violent and attacking all those around them."

"After a few months, with most of the city inhabitants having fled or died within the walls, Simon arrived at the city. He called the cursed to him and they became his servants inside the city. He proclaimed himself King of Linavia, sending out his mindless minions to farm his food and steal his gold. His ambition grew with his wealth and he turned his eyes westward, towards the neighbouring dukedom of Duloc." Fiona gasped – Duloc, apart from being Lord Farquaad's old stomping ground, was only a hundred miles east of Far Far Away. Flora nodded towards her, then continued her story.

"We three tried to stop him, but the effort nearly killed us all. We asked another for help – Dama Fortuna, another fairy. Her own sister, Maria, had been captured by Simon and under his control fought against Dama. Dama succeeded where we had failed – she trapped Simon in a pillar of stone, ending his control over Linavia. The cursed were released, returning to their former selves. Maria Fortuna fled the city, ashamed that she had turned against her sister. The people left, unable to live somewhere filled with the stench of corruption and death."

"Why could Dama defeat Simon when no-one else could?" asked Lillian.

"She was more powerful – occasionally a fairy clan will arise who are almost unequalled in magical ability. Maria Fortuna was the elder sister – her magic was less controlled, less reliable. Dama was the younger sister – a more powerful, controlled and intelligent fairy," answered Fauna, pleased that the queen was showing an interest in the history of their kind.

"What became of Dama?" asked Harold.

"She went back to brewing potions in a small factory and, after meeting you one day in the woods, she became the official Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away," replied Flora. A silence descended around the table.

"So FGM was the only one who could kill this guy and she's dead?" asked Donkey, effectively summarising for the slow-of-thinking around the table.

"Yes," said Flora. "Unless of course Maria is still alive and has learned to control her magic. She was almost as powerful as Dama." The guards returned at that moment with Gingy who was struggling inside a hemp sack. They tipped him out unceremoniously onto the stone floor, backing off quickly. Gingy screeched a few times in rage, but soon calmed down when he realised he was not being threatened any longer. He sat down on the floor and stared blankly forwards. Flora flew towards him.

"And now to find who did this to you" she started.

"I thought it was my turn to do the important magic?" interrupted Merryweather.

"I beg your pardon?"

"You always do the important spells. And you always give the first gift and I always have to go last. You always have to lead!"

"That's because I'm older and better than you! This is hardly the time!"

While her siblings continued to squabble, Fauna raised her wand over Gingy's head. She muttered under her breath, then shouted, "Reveal!" A thin wisp of purple smoke wound itself upwards from Gingy's heart and formed itself into a snake above his head. The snake rose as if to strike, revealing itself as a cobra as its mane flared out. The cobra's fangs bared, then the image disintegrated into coloured sand, disappearing as it hit the floor. Gingy blinked at Fauna, then went back to staring at the wall. She turned to the council.

"Simon Debaal is back – Fairy Godmother's magic must have failed when she died." The council muttered amongst themselves, Flora and Merryweather ending their argument for now in order to help the others.

"There is only one logical course of action," said Harold. "We must try to find Maria Fortuna, and convince her to aid us in saving our kingdom. Meanwhile, spread the word not to threaten anyone who appears in this state – have them brought to the palace and we will try to contain them here. Keep the gates locked unless absolutely necessary. An armed guard is to accompany all farmers leaving and returning from work on the fields." Harold shook a little, then continued. "Volunteers to come with me to find Maria?" Puss immediately jumped onto the table, brandishing his sword. Shrek raised his hand, as did Donkey. Fiona looked at Shrek, smiled and started to raise her right hand.

"No darling," said Lillian. "You are not to leave. If something happens to your father, you will be Queen. If something happens to both of you, we will have no-one left here to take the crown."

"But mother, you would be here!"

"Oh no darling, I'm going with your father." Harold looked at his wife in horror – she had never left the city to go on a quest before!

"Lillian I really must protest" he started.

"Hush now Harold, did you really think I'd let you go alone?" Lillian smiled at him softly, then turned back to her daughter. "You are not to leave Fiona, I think you have more to consider here than just your own safety." Lillian raised an eyebrow at Fiona and her daughter sighed, defeated.

"Be careful," whispered Fiona to Shrek, kissing him lightly on the cheek.

That night, under cover of darkness, Shrek led Donkey out of the back gates to the city. Lillian followed at a few paces behind, pausing to wave to Fiona. Harold and Puss sat on Donkey's back, looking back as the gates closed with a final thud behind them. They would have to travel for many days before they came to the seashore, to an area where the three fairies believed Maria Fortuna was hiding. Assuming she was still there of course. Not wanting to be discovered, the five travelled silently into the night, listening for any sign of Simon Debaal.


	7. Maria

The intrepid travellers reached the seashore on the fourth night, gentle sands and vast blue ocean stretching as far as the eye could see. Another day's travel would take them to Widow's Cove, a sharp headland where the shore held underwater rocks hidden from view – the cause of many a shipwreck. It was in a cave at Widow's Cove that Maria Fortuna had hidden all those years ago and, it was thought, where she would still be found. Merryweather had provided Lillian with a map of the coast and now she unfolded it as the 'boys' set up camp for the night. Harold jumped onto her lap to see the map and she stroked his back absent-mindedly as they read. Meanwhile, Shrek and Donkey collected firewood while Puss made a circle of their camp, searching for enemies. The cat had taken to sleeping by day on Donkey's back and patrolling the camp at night such that there was always a guard on duty. So far, however, they had encountered no trouble whatsoever – except for a small group of mountain trolls that had run off as soon as they saw Shrek. Donkey was busy singing as he collected firewood, the lack of danger taking his mind back to his family. He started singing "Danny Boy" to a melancholy beat while Shrek lit the fire and Puss returned from his patrol.

"Nothing boss. Just like last night."

"That's good – that's exactly what we need right now," said Shrek, relieved that the feline had found no trouble. "We need to get to Maria quickly." He looked out towards the shore dreamily, remembering his honeymoon.

"It's too quiet boss, I don't like it," replied Puss tensely. "I can't explain why – it's just not right! There should be something this far away from civilisation – even if it's only a tramp or a highwayman!"

"Perhaps they were scared off by you Puss," said Donkey, "from what I've heard, you can beat the fastest retreat in the west!"

"You weren't there," said Puss sadly, his tail and head dropping as he remembered how cowardly he'd been. "I couldn't take them all – not without killing them at any rate. And they were my friends."

"I know, I know, no need to get all het up about it. Seriously, do you think anyone would pick on us with an ogre by our side? The big guy's been scaring them all off for us, haven't ya? Shrek? Now where's he gone to?"

'The big guy' had wandered off to sit by the shore, throwing stones into the sea with some force. He was missing Fiona and spending days with her parents in her absence was rather surreal for him. Especially when the royal couple were so obviously in love. Shrek sighed and watched the setting sun dipping over the royal blue sea, the waves slicing the image and slowly hypnotising him, sending him into a gentle doze. He remembered sitting on a shore similar to this one not long ago, watching the same sun with Fiona. Why was their world constantly in danger, why did it always have to end with him on a quest to save their little family? Shrek sighed and stood up, heading back to the campfire.

Puss completed his tenth circuit of the camp and cast a lazy eye over the sleeping companions. Lillian was curled onto her side, her head cradled by her arm. On her pillow, Harold tried to nestle close to her. Shrek lay flat on his back on the opposite side of the fire, snoring loudly. Donkey was curled like a puppy not far from Shrek. It struck Puss that the sleepers were fully reliant on his protecting them – he would have laughed a year ago if you had told him he would be guarding royalty. He wondered if his life had been simpler then, or he had just ignored all the complications in favour of fighting. Puss gathered his sword and started yet another circle of the camp, knowing in all probability that he would find nothing again. This peaceful atmosphere was starting to ring alarm bells with Puss. Surely adventures were supposed to full of danger and swordfights? Preferably with people you're allowed to kill, he thought, remembering Gingy and the others.

The next morning the party headed towards the final leg of their journey, the last few miles to Widow's Cove. They arrived at the rocky outcrop that formed a series of caves just before midday, the hot sun beating down onto the bleached white rocks, baking the rockpools and forming crystals of salt at their edges. At the seafront itself, Lillian spotted a woman sitting on a rock, throwing stones into the sea. The group approached cautiously. The woman was thin, with long black hair. She was wearing a long, emerald green cloak wrapped tightly around her. Deciding that Lillian was the least unusual of their number, they sent her forward to greet the stranger.

Lillian walked loudly up to the woman, crunching seashells underfoot as she got closer. She knew she had been heard, but the other woman did not acknowledge her presence until Lillian had drawn level with her.

"Hello? Are you Maria Fortuna?" asked Lillian, more than a little nervous.

"Yes. And who are you?"

"Queen Lillian of Far Far Away. I am here with my husband to beg your help in dealing with a new threat to our kingdom."

"I know." Maria stood and looked up into Lillian's face. The queen was taken aback – apart from the hair, Maria looked like a younger, kinder version of Fairy Godmother. Maria did not wear glasses, her crystal blue eyes burning into Lillian's with a fierce intelligence. She smiled at Lillian. "I understand that you and yours are responsible for the death of my dear sister."

"Yes."

"Is that the ogre I have heard so much about?"

"Yes – how have you heard of us?"

"My dear girl, were you not told that magic runs in families?" She laughed and pushed off her cloak, revealing scarlet wings. She sprung easily into the air and flew over to Shrek. "I should thank you, brave ogre, for ridding the world of such an evil and twisted individual. Few could have possessed the courage to stand up to her. I know – I lived with her for years!" She giggled and picked up Harold. "Perhaps we can work out how to turn you back one day, hmmm?" At that moment, she spotted Puss and Donkey. She patted Donkey's nose and then stroked Puss under the chin. Puss purred, enjoying the attention. Maria turned back to Lillian. "Cup of tea?"


	8. Gaining an ally

Maria led the party up the cove and into the woods on the headland. A small cottage was hidden amidst the trees, smoke puffing out of the chimney. Bluebirds darted in front of the thatch, rising to dance with the swallows who had their nests in the eaves. Shrek was reminded of the Fairy Godmother's cottage – apart from the factory, of course. Lillian hugged Harold to her chest, nervous of the fairy who was taking her sister's death a little too well. Puss and Donkey followed at what Donkey considered to be a safe distance – about twenty yards from Maria and increasing.

Inside the cottage, Maria prepared some tea while the team checked out the living room. A wholesome fire burned in the hearth, while flowered wallpaper decorated the walls with embroidered cushions scattered liberally throughout the room. Altogether, the room looked as though it had been decorated by someone who had been told what "English Cottage Style" was, then had lost their notes on the subject and replaced them with "101 ways to fool people you have class" by Lauren L. Bevan (the current interior design favourite of the upper classes of Far Far Away). Lillian tried hard to find something positive to say about the room, but gave up and settled down on a chair, moving a cushion decorated with a distressed-looking-cat motif out of the way first.

"Now, tell me everything," said Maria, handing out cups of tea with flicks of her wand.

An hour passed, Shrek and Lillian relaying most of the story with timely interruptions by Puss and Harold. Donkey, attention span waning, fell asleep. The story told, the assembled company sat back to contemplate what to do next. Lillian broke the silence.

"How long has it been since you spoke to your sister?" she asked.

"About twenty years – we didn't really speak. We fought a lot, cursed a lot, and tried to kill each other but I wouldn't say we really spoke very much."

"I'm sorry if her death has caused you any distress..." started Lillian.

"Oh no, not at all my dear. If anything, it is I who should be apologising – for allowing her to control your kingdom for so long." Maria flew over and took Lillian's hands in hers. "Forgive me?"

"Yes, of course," muttered Lillian, a little confused. Maria kneeled to Harold and passed her hands over him a few times, mumbling some strange words the king and queen had not heard before. As Lillian rose defensively to protect Harold, Maria threw her hands in the air and started to weep.

"It's no good – I can't help him! Dama's magic is too strong! I can't change him back," she cried. Harold hopped up to her.

"That's alright. I was getting used to being a frog again," he sighed sadly, jumping onto Lillian's lap and curling up to hide his face. Lillian touched his head lightly, smiling down at him.

"So, you two didna get along then?" said Shrek to Maria, trying to steer the conversation back to the matter they'd travelled days to discuss.

"No. When we were children she always bullied me because I was weaker than her, always beat me down. She chased me out of the family home when I was twelve – I kept trying to make peace with her, but she just turned more and more violent towards me. She hated me so much – I was thinner than her, but she was always the pretty one." Maria smiled at Shrek and the others, Shrek deciding that however pretty Dama had been when they were younger, Maria was prettier than he remembered the Fairy Godmother to have been.

"Why did you work with Simon?" asked Shrek.

"He used his magic on me – I was little more than a soulless wreck – like those poor friends of yours you've told me about."

"How did Fairy Godmother defeat Simon?"

"I... don't remember. I was still in a trance. She was so angry – I remember coming out of that trance and seeing her running towards me, murder in her eyes." Maria's eyes welled up and she hugged Shrek's hands tightly. "I knew then that she was lost to me forever as my sister – the closest we could ever be from that point on was enemies."

"She didn't strike me as particularly stable," murmured Shrek. "Will you help us?" Maria looked around at the emissaries and smiled, nodding emphatically at Shrek's request.

"Of course I will! Stay here tonight, then go home tomorrow. I will need a few days to pack, then will follow you back to your castle. Expect my arrival on the morning of the third day after you arrive home."

The night was spent chatting around the fire about Far Far Away. Maria seemed fascinated by Shrek and Fiona's marriage, laughing out loud when she was told of the day the two had arrived at the castle to a less-than-warm reception. Maria listened to how Fairy Godmother had died, flinching slightly at the description of how she'd transfigured into bubbles before evaporating. As the firelight died, Puss curled onto the hearth rug to go to sleep. Donkey made his way out to the garden to graze before napping, while Lillian and Harold headed to the guestroom and Shrek curled up on the expansive sofa. Feeling safer than they had for some time, all five slept well that night, watched over by Maria.

The next morning the party set off after a wonderful breakfast cooked by Maria, who stood waving brightly to them from the door of her cottage. Lillian waved back, smiling and giggling girlishly until they were out of sight. After walking for another five minutes, Lillian's smile faded and she continued in stony silence.

"She was nice," said Puss. "Nice fireplace."

"Nice smile," volunteered Shrek.

"Nice house," said Harold.

"Nice a..." started Donkey.

"And do you trust her, darling?" interrupted Harold.

"Not for a second," replied Lillian, staring ahead as they headed for home.


	9. Maria arrives

In preparation for the arrival of Maria Fortuna, the royal family of Far Far Away did the only thing it could do to ensure that their new ally was made to feel at home – they planned a party. The cooks at the palace were instructed to prepare a feast and the servants busied themselves in making the palace and town look more 'presentable' in readiness for Maria's arrival. Flowers were arranged around the entrances to the town and castle, while the guards were doubled to protect against any possible incursion by Simon before Maria arrived.

The potions factory was still using the old 'Fairy Godmother' signs to advertise their products, with some of the billboards still visible in the older parts of the town. Harold gave orders for the signs to be removed, hoping that their absence would avoid any chance of their offending Maria. Workmen were busy throughout the town, removing all traces of the former Fairy Godmother for two days, starting with the palatial areas of town and working towards the old district, where the workers of the kingdom lived.

Maria arrived with dawn on the third day, as promised. Once she passed through the city gates, she made a show of casting a protective spell on the main gate to ensure that no-one with ill intent could pass through it unannounced. The day was spent in a meeting with the magical council, during which their plan of action was decided upon.

"In summary," concluded Maria, pointing at various points on a map of Far Far Away as she spoke, "I will create a distraction to the south of the city which will attract Simon. Your army will close in behind to help me defeat him once and for all."

"I'm not comfortable with removing the entire army from the city – could we not keep at least a third of the army here to protect the people in case the attack fails?" asked Lillian.

"My dear girl – I hate to state the obvious, but if our attack fails, it will not matter if you have a third, a half or the whole of your army in here! Simon has taken out larger forces on his own before. Your only advantage is my presence." Maria patted Lillian's arm in a comforting gesture. "I understand that it is hard to accept – but I am not my sister, and I do have your well-being at heart. Please believe me!" Maria drew back her hand and looked imploringly at Lillian.

"My apologies. Of course, you are right about the army. You're right about everything..." Lillian drawled. "I'm sorry – I seem to be a little unwell. Would you all excuse me?" Lillian dipped a quick curtsey to Harold and left the room quickly. Fiona followed her mother.

"May I ask if there is anyone on the council prepared to help me to distract Simon?" asked Maria.

"I will," said Fauna, piping up from the far end of the table between Merryweather and Flora. Her sisters nodded in agreement. The druids shook their heads – afraid their magic would prove too weak in the heat of battle. Similarly, the wood spirits and talking animals declined to offer their services.

"It is no matter – I'm sure between the four of us, we should be more than a match for one sorcerer." Maria continued talking with the council for some time, watched warily by Shrek and Harold who were constantly on alert for any suspicious behaviour. As the council broke up, Fiona re-entered the room and linked her arm through Shrek's. She checked for Maria's whereabouts, then when she saw Maria was talking with Fauna and Merryweather she slipped a note into Shrek's hand unnoticed. She stood on tiptoe and whispered into Shrek's ear.

"Mother is unwell. She scribbled that note and told me to hand it to you for you and my father to read. She told me not to read the note but to keep Maria busy for the next few hours so that you have time to act. I love you!" Fiona pecked Shrek on the cheek and smiled brightly, before heading over to Maria. "Maria!" said Fiona loudly, "Would you like to see the library? After all, if we're not going to attack until next week, we should relax today, don't you think?" Fiona giggled and linked her arm into Maria's, leading her out of the council room. Once the council had dispersed, Shrek read the note in his hand.

_Maria can read your mind if she's touching you. She cannot be trusted. Find somewhere outside the castle to decide what to do – I think she's using her magic inside the castle to spy on us._

He lifted Harold onto his arm to read the note, then ripped it in half and burned one half in the fireplace. The other half he pocketed to dispose of outside the castle.

"I know just the place – but we'll need an escort," said Harold.

* * *

"Two pints, a whiskey, a bucket of water for the ass and a packet of crisps Doris," shouted Puss over the noise of the bar. Harold, Shrek and Donkey were seated in a corner of the Poisoned Apple trying to look inconspicuous. Harold had reasoned that if Maria were to follow them, her presence would not go unnoticed in the pub and they would be able to slip away quickly. The downside was that they'd had to leave the safety of the city walls to visit the pub. Puss made his way back to the table, weaving elegantly between the patrons of Doris' bar. 

"As I was saying," said Puss, putting down the drinks, "she's nicer than her sister."

"I don't like it. It was too easy to convince her and then there's the business with Lillian not trusting her," answered Shrek.

"But Lillian is not well and you know, could be paranoid because of that. Couldn't she? I mean, that voodoo about Maria reading her mind. How would Lillian know?" said Donkey.

"She always had a certain strength of mind – that's why the Fairy Godmother could never intimidate her. Me on the other hand..." Harold trailed off. "Besides, there's something more serious than Lillian's suspicions."

"What?" asked Shrek.

"Before the Fairy Godmother took over the Keebler Elves' factory, anyone from the kingdom that needed a potion would have to send off for it to two sisters who used to brew potions in a duchy not far from Duloc. I remember people at court talking about it just after Lillian and I married – they wanted a cure for the old king and were thinking of sending off to 'the sisters' for a potion." Harold tried to take a sip of his pint, but found it empty. I must have drained it, he thought.

"What's so strange about that?" asked Puss.

"I think 'the sisters' were Maria and the Fairy Godmother," said Harold.

"So they used to work together before Maria was taken over by Simon. Big deal," said Donkey.

"It is Donkey – because Maria told us that she was thrown out of the house by her sister when she was only twelve. They couldn't have worked together if that was true," said Shrek slowly, suspicion rearing its ugly head in the conversation. In the background, Hook started to play "Feelings" in B flat, killing any emotion that the song could once have held.

"Perhaps she feels we would not trust her if she say she like her sister, so she say they had problems so we don't think she's the same as Fairy Godmother, si?" said Puss.

"Perhaps. But I still don't trust her," said Shrek, reaching for his pint but finding it mysteriously empty.

"Well, what are we going to do?" croaked Harold. "My wife and daughter are in the castle trying to distract Maria long enough for us to come up with a plan to protect us from her, while we're sitting here and failing to come up with anything!"

"There's not much we can do," said Donkey, "unless of course Maria steps out of line. At the moment we have only vague suspicions and exaggerated gut-feelings which may be completely wrong when we compare them to Maria's true intent. How do we know that Maria is at fault here – we may be simply looking for a problem where none exists in actuality." Donkey looked at the other three drinkers and very slowly blinked. Then he let out a loud belch and fell backwards, snoring before he hit the floor. Shrek sniffed the air.

"Beer. He's been drinking our pints again!" he sighed. "Puss – ask Doris to make room in the stable for Donkey. He won't wake up for hours and I'm not carrying him back. And get some more beers." Puss nodded and left to get the drinks.

"If only we had some way to be sure," said Harold. Behind him, Hook closed the piano lid, bowed to the audience who were looking anywhere but at him, snarled and left for his night off.

An hour and several pints later, the trio were no closer to making a decision about how they would prove Maria's treachery, or loyalty, whichever it was. Shrek and Harold were starting to relax, the tension of the last few weeks fading as they drank. Puss was on high alert however, skipping drinks in order to remain sober enough to protect the two royals who would be returning home later that evening. Donkey had long since been carried to the stable, snoring loudly and complaining in his sleep. Puss watched as Shrek and Harold called over Doris to order some more drinks. Doris added them to the slate, then winked at her new boyfriend Robert who was helping out tonight. She had long since ditched Charming in preference for someone who took less time to get ready in the mornings than she did. The fact that Charming had seemed less than interested in Doris had also put her off the prince somewhat. A young man took a seat at the piano and started to play "Everything I do..." while singing in a cracked falsetto voice. Puss cringed throughout the song – he had forgotten that Doris had started a 'local talent night' where regulars of the pub would provide the entertainment on Hook's night off. The regulars were not naturally gifted singers, although their attempts could prove amusing. Unless the singer was particularly good (or awfully bad) they tended not to interrupt the conversations in the bar in any case, good singers being rewarded by silence for their attempts and bad singers receiving thrown bottles and mild verbal abuse. Puss was relieved when a young girl took her seat next, with a tuneful rendition of "I put a spell on you."

Puss tapped his feet as he brought over another round for the drinkers, swaying in time to the music. Shrek and Harold were now planning to defeat Simon by staying in the castle and throwing stones. He decided they should leave after this drink, or Doris would have to make up more room in the stable. As he sat down, another young hopeful sat at the piano and started to play. Puss was sufficiently unimpressed by the simple tune to ignore it, but soon changed his mind when he heard the man start to sing in a husky voice, depression dripping from each word.

* * *

I'm so tired of being here 

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you had to leave

I wish that you would just leave

'Cause your presence still lingers here...

* * *

The singer faltered, touched his heart lightly, then continued with the song. His haunting tones silenced the pub and he continued in the silence of a rapt audience. Puss used this opportunity to take a look at the singer. Unlike the other hopefuls, he was not dressed perfectly with immaculate hair and nails. In fact, he looked like he hadn't washed for months, his hair unkempt and his clothing marked with various stains. The singer wore a long dark cloak pulled tightly around himself and dark grey trousers and looked as though he had just decided to get up and sing over his last drink. Puss listened to the song as he scanned the clientele of the pub. There was not a dry eye – the young man's haunting tones echoing through the audience and pulling at every heartstring. Puss decided to go and relieve himself outside before he was forced to destroy his assassin's image by crying in front of everyone.

* * *

Still you have 

All of me

* * *

Puss heard the last few bars of the song and judged it safe to return to the bar. He passed close to the piano as he entered, the young man just closing the lid of the piano. Unseen because of his height, Puss took this chance to examine the young man more closely – he was sure he had seen him before. The dark unkempt hair was matched by the dishevelled beard and moustache. As he stood up, his cloak brushed aside and Puss saw that the grey trousers were in fact part of a very old silver spandex suit. The name "Kyle" was just visible before the man pulled the cloak around himself and slunk back to a corner of the pub where his drink still waited for him. Puss rushed back to the table. 

"Boss! It's the Fairy Godmother's chauffeur!" he cried, pointing at Kyle. Shrek looked over at the opposite corner.

"You sure?"

"Yes! We should talk to him," started Puss, before turning to Harold. "Perhaps he would have known Maria – after all he did work for Fairy Godmother for some time."

"Work's not all he did, if what I've heard is true," giggled Harold, sliding slowly off his seat. "Where's Shrek gone to?"

Shrek walked briskly up to Kyle's table, his large frame blocking most of the light so that Kyle's expression of disgust at the sight of the ogre became obscured.

"Kyle! You used to have a whip didn't ya?"

"Yes," replied Kyle coldly. "Can I help you?"

"Och, my old chuffer, I was just wondering how things were with you now that the old battleaxe is gone. Bet you're glad to be rid of her..." he slurred. "Now, there's was something I wanted to ask..."

"She was right about you," spat Kyle. "You insensitive ogre!" Kyle stood quickly and punched at Shrek's jaw, hitting the bone. Shrek, being an ogre, barely noticed, but Kyle was sent hopping off in pain, nursing his hand. "You have no idea!" he shouted.

"Now don't be like that," said Shrek, aware that the pub had silenced in order to fully take in this unexpected entertainment. "I just meant it must be nice, you know, to have more free time now that the nagging, whining firefly from hell had gone. And also," he started, but did not finish as Harold and Puss both jumped him, gagging him with paws and feet. Kyle signalled to Doris for his bill, paid it and drank a whiskey she offered him.

"Same time tomorrow Doris," he scowled, marching through the door.

"Nice one Shrek," said Harold. "Now what are we going to do?"

* * *

**The song is "My Immortal" by Evanescence. It's always made me cry.**


	10. Kyle's story

A lone figure watched as the last Fairy Godmother sign was removed from a roadside, the billboard silhouetted in the evening haze. The workmen allowed it to fall to the ground and it shattered, scattering dust. Finished for the evening, they started to pile the debris onto a cart. The cart was filled before the sign was cleared however, and they headed for the recycling mill leaving the remainder of the sign for collection in the morning – their need to return to the city before dark more pressing than the need to clear the roadside. The lone figure watched them go, then approached the debris cautiously. He ferreted around for a while amongst the wreckage before finding what he was looking for. He held a small piece of billboard in his right hand and used his left to clear some dust from the surface. He walked to the riverbank and sat down, reaching for a bottle of whiskey from his cloak. He sat down, staring at the image and occasionally swigging from the bottle. Finally, the whiskey finished, the figure rose to his feet, threw the bottle in the river and took one last look at the fragment in his hand. Placing the sign carefully on the bridge, arranging it so it caught the light, the figure stepped back and stroked the picture once with his right hand before crossing the bridge and heading into the Poisoned Apple pub.

The figure was, of course, Kyle and he had, of course, been watched all the while by Shrek, Donkey and Puss in Boots. Shrek walked forward and picked up the fragment of billboard. The fragment was a foot long, about half a foot wide and was decorated with a picture of the smiling face of the Fairy Godmother. Shrek called over his companions and replaced the sign.

"That's one lovesick chauffeur," said Shrek. "Do you really think he'll be able to tell us what Maria is like Puss?"

"Si, but we should tread carefully signor. The pain of grief is obviously unbearable for him at the moment and if he has learned her sister is here as well, he may act irrationally."

"Not to mention the fact you really ticked him off last night," added Donkey.

"Are we ready?" said Shrek, ignoring Donkey. "Puss?"

"Check!"

"Donkey?"

"Check? Shrek?"

"Check. Let's do this." The trio headed into the pub.

Kyle was back in his corner, drinking already. Shrek and Puss approached slowly. Shrek coughed politely and Kyle looked up, his eyes narrowing in anger.

"What do you want?"

"We were hoping you could give us some information about Fairy Godmother's sister, Maria," blurted out Puss, wishing to keep the conversation away from last night. Kyle shook his head sadly and looked down.

"Listen, about yesterday, I'm sorry about what I said," started Shrek.

"I suppose you are entitled to your view," sighed Kyle. "She did try repeatedly to destroy your marriage and then to kill you." As if coming to a decision, Kyle pushed his drink away from him and beckoned for the three to sit down. "What did you want to know and why?"

"Everything. As for why, Maria is in the castle at the moment talking with the king and queen about how to defeat a sorcerer called Simon," said Shrek.

"Simon's back?" exclaimed Kyle.

"Yeah – where have you been – at the bottom of a bottle for three weeks?" said Donkey.

"Yes, actually. You'd better make yourselves comfortable." Kyle sighed and settled back in his seat, taking out a pair of glasses from a pocket in his cloak and turning them over in his hands as he spoke. The trio watched him with a mix of pity and interest.

"Go on," said Shrek.

"Fifteen years ago, I was a silly eighteen-year-old just out of Duloc's butler college. I was expected to find employment with a rich family as a doorman, slowly rising through the ranks and eventually running a household. But then my parents died and I had nowhere to live. I was a mess – an emotional wreck. Living on the streets, I became more and more depressed. Then one day I bumped into Maria Fortuna – literally, it hurt. She had been gathering supplies in Duloc for the laboratory she worked in. She'd dropped some parcels when we collided, so to make it up to her I offered to carry them home. We chatted on the way about nothing much in particular – I found her a bit of an airhead to tell you the truth. She invited me in for a cup of tea. When we went inside, she suddenly became irritated by something and scowled."

"That something was her sister, Dama. Maria introduced her as the 'fat twin sister' and I remember Dama turning away to hide tears. She was much fatter than Maria, but still pretty. It was while I was comparing the two sisters – Dama had long lavender hair and it contrasted with Maria's – that I noticed Dama had wings. Maria must have noticed me staring at them, because she took that opportunity to remove her cloak and revealed her black wings. She told me they were fairies, aged over forty, who had always worked together making potions and the like. Maria spoke for hours and I did try to listen, but I was more interested in the quieter, more reserved Dama. Around four o'clock, we were interrupted by the arrival of a young lad of about eight."

"Prince Charming?" asked Shrek.

"Yes. When I asked Maria about him, she told me that Dama had been married to the king of Ubertowyn, over the mountain and that the boy was his. The king had been killed by his brother, who stole the throne, forcing Dama and her son to flee."

"So he's really a prince? I always thought that it was a fake title, you know, like Aseem or Ali," said Donkey.

"Dama fussed over that boy terribly. She was determined he would not be harmed, that he would always look his best and one day he would claim his throne back."

"Explains a lot," mumbled Puss.

"Charming left for dance class, so I took that as a good point to make my excuses and leave. As I did so, Maria pecked me on the cheek and asked me to come again. I can remember Dama watching the kiss, and the way Maria smirked victoriously at Dama as I left. It was all I could do not to run from that place. I thought I'd never go back, but I found I had to. Not when Maria was there of course – I dropped in to see Dama, offering to take Charming to school so that she would have more time for her work. From what I could see, Dama was involved with making potions and charms while Maria fetched and carried as little as possible. Maria once tried to impress me by making a paper bird out of a sheet of paper and making it sweep passed me using her wand. She couldn't do it, but Dama stood behind her and timed her spells with Maria's so that Maria would believe she was controlling the bird."

"There was always some tension between them, but all I could draw out of Dama was that years earlier, Maria had been in the control of some evil sorcerer that Dama had killed. Maria had been in love with the sorcerer and, even though she would admit he had hurt a lot of people, she had never really forgiven Dama for killing him. Not long after the bird incident, Maria and Dama had their last fight. Maria was jealous of the attention I was paying to Dama and Charming. She tried to kill Charming, but Dama overpowered her and threw her out of the cottage. From there, she went back to a cottage the two had owned near the sea. Dama asked if I was going to leave. Of course I couldn't – I was already more than half in love with Dama. I told her I'd help her rebuild her business."

"Within nine months, the Keebler Elves had sold Dama their factory, she had a staff of six hundred, not to mention the security guards, and she was amassing a small fortune. That was when she started to change – she became more confident, but also more manipulative when it came to her clients. Or perhaps that was a side of her I just hadn't seen before. When the king found out who she was, he appointed her the official Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away, based on some favour she'd done for him years earlier. She'd always granted a few wishes here and there, but now she was available through a calling card. She was obsessed with her work and never went home on time – almost neglecting Charming and leaving him in my care. I was told to groom him as a prince and that an agreement existed to marry him to Fiona, but nothing more. You know the rest."

"If you want to know which fairy was worse, it was most certainly Maria. Dama became lazy towards her work in later years and obsessed over her son – she would happily kill for him if necessary, as you saw. But Maria was always cruel and manipulative – many of the hopeless cases Dama was called to help had been cursed by Maria, including Fiona."

"What!" shouted Shrek, Puss and Donkey together.

"Maria had heard that Dama had helped King Harold when he fell for Lillian. She thought that she'd get her own back on Dama through Harold and cursed Fiona. Dama just used the opportunity to arrange the marriage to Charming."

"Is there any other way to fight Simon without Fairy Godmother?" asked Shrek.

"No. Many armies through the centuries turned to zombies in front of Simon."

"Centuries?" said Puss.

"He steals his victims' life force to extend his own life. Dama was your only hope."

"But she's dead," said Donkey. All four drinkers looked down at the glasses in Kyle's hand.

"Damn."

"Hell."

"Aren't we gonna tell the king he's let an evil sorcerer's girlfriend into his castle?" asked Donkey. Puss, Shrek and Kyle stared at this unusually sensible comment from the usually stupid Donkey. Shrek turned to Kyle.

"Come with us! We need your insight to help us save this kingdom."

"Why? This kingdom took the only woman I ever loved. Why should I help it now?"

"Because if you do not, signor, the sister she hated will rule this kingdom and destroy whatever good she did do for this kingdom." Puss drew his sword and saluted Kyle. "I swear to you signor, that if you help us we will destroy your lady's enemies." Kyle stood and ripped off a smart salute to Puss.

"How can I refuse a cat on a mission. Count me in – on one condition."

"Yes?" said Shrek.

"Take me somewhere I can have a bath and a haircut. And keep me out of sight of Maria – if she sees me, she'll suspect you're up to something."

"We'll keep you out of the castle – Lillian thinks Maria is spying on us there."

"She is good at mind tricks – she will have set up a spy network inside the castle by now."

"Shall we go?" asked Puss. The four stood and started to leave. Shrek stopped, pulled a card from his pocket and gave it to Kyle. It was the calling card Fairy Godmother had given to Fiona some months earlier. Kyle felt his eyes mist as he looked at the card.

"Thank-you," he whispered.


	11. A quick conversation and a new hope

The next morning found Shrek, Harold, Kyle, Puss and Donkey lurking in a dark corner of Farbucks, trying not to be seen.

"How is Lillian this morning?" asked Shrek.

"She still has a lousy headache, but she feels much better. She's more convinced than ever that Maria was reading her mind," answered Harold. "Lillian doesn't want to be told of anything we're planning in case Maria finds out through her."

"Of course," said Puss.

"Where are these fairies?" asked Shrek. "It's been half an hour."

"I don't mind – this coffee's great!" said Donkey.

"How many have you had?" asked Puss.

"Four – and counting!" Donkey was unused to coffee and the caffeine high he was riding caused him to speak more quickly than usual. He was shaking ever so slightly. "Another please!" A waitress acknowledged his order.

"Decaff for the ass!" shouted Puss. Before Donkey could respond, the three good fairies entered Farbucks. It became obvious that they had never entered a coffee house before – they huddled together protectively and stared bewildered at the menu. Shrek waved to attract their attention, then realised he probably hadn't needed to – there were not many seven foot tall ogres in Farbucks this morning. The three fairies rushed to the corner and sat down awkwardly on the moulded chairs.

"What did you want?" asked Fauna. "And why all the secrecy?"

"We have reason to believe that Maria may not be as loyal as we were led to believe," said Harold, "this is Kyle – he knew both Maria and Fairy Godmother when they still worked together. Maria has been lying to us." Harold related all their evidence to the three fairies.

"What are we going to do?" gasped Merryweather.

"Assuming it's true of course," added Fauna.

"What do you mean?" demanded Kyle.

"You have to admit that you are a little biased dear," said Flora softly. Kyle stood and glared at the three fairies.

"I told you it was a waste of time asking these three for help," snapped Kyle, storming out of Farbucks. His temper carried him through the streets of Far Far Away and into the rented cottage he was hiding in from Maria. Idiots, he thought. Why couldn't they just believe him – were they really as stupid as Fairy Godmother had always said?

Later that afternoon, Kyle heard a knock at the door and opened it cautiously. A short woman in a large dark cloak was standing outside. Kyle reached for the fire iron he'd hidden behind the doorframe in case this happened.

"Can I help you?" he asked the cloak, raising the fire iron behind the door.

"It's me, Flora, can I come in?" She looked up at Kyle.

"If you're trying to blend in, you're making a real hash of the attempt."

"Let me in?"

"Quickly. Before Maria herself sees you." Kyle ushered her quickly through the door and closed it behind Flora, keeping his grip on the fire iron. Flora sat down nervously, then stood, removed her cloak and started rubbing her palms together in an agitated way. "What is it?" asked Kyle.

"There's something we need to discuss."

"What?"

"We're all agreed that Maria is probably a traitor."

"Good – then you three will help us overthrow her?"

"No."

"But you just said..."

"Let me finish. With Dama Fortuna dead, Maria is our best chance of defeating Simon."

"But she's in love with Simon!"

"I know. But with Dama Fortuna dead, we have no choice but to trust Maria."

"Why did you bother to come here if only to state the obvious?"

"Because there is an obvious solution. Let me see if you can work it out Kyle," said Flora, her patience waning. "With _Dama Fortuna dead_ we have no other options when it come to fighting Simon."

"So?"

"So if our only problem is that Dama is dead, we need to?" she paused, waiting for the proverbial copper disc to fall.

"We need to see to it that she's no longer dead?" asked Kyle, scarcely daring to hope he was right.

"Right! But there's a problem. The spell that would raise Dama is dangerous and my sisters believe that it is too risky. They will not consider performing the _reparare vita_ spell as the last three people who have tried have all died painful deaths and the spell has failed in each case. We have agreed that there will be no attempt by my sisters or myself to raise Dama in a mass rebellion against Maria."

"Then it is hopeless?"

"No, because despite what I may have agreed in front of my sisters, I am quite willing to perform the resurrection spell and risk my own life if it will save this kingdom."

"I can't ask you to do that," said Kyle. "And nor can this kingdom."

"That is why I am insisting you help me, rather than waiting for you to ask. Do you know what happened to Dama's wand?"

"I have it." Kyle ran into his bedroom, threw open the drawer and pulled out Fairy Godmother's wand. He passed it to Flora.

"This is all we need – well done!" said Flora, smiling. "Keep it safe – you must bring it tomorrow morning at around three o' clock up to the hill above the castle."

"Why so early?"

"We need to cast the spell as dawn breaks. There is one more thing – a price if you like."

"What is it?"

"Like all truly powerful spells, a condition has to be met within a time limit or the spell will reverse. In this case, I think we'll go for the traditional – she will have to kiss her true love by midnight."

"That is me, isn't it?" asked Kyle. "The definition of true love is so precise, it might not actually be me despite the fact we were involved before she died."

"It's you Kyle. I'm as sure as anyone can be that it's you. But the problem is, she cannot be told the condition until after she's met it."

"So if I tell her she has to kiss me to live?"

"She'll die immediately. And so will you."

"What?"

"_Reparare_ _vita _is one of those 'double-or-quits' spells. Either you win and Fairy Godmother lives, or you lose and both of you die. You have to offer your life in exchange for Dama's in case she does not kiss you."

"And the last three times people have tried this?"

"The spell-caster and the true love, viz your role, have died horribly."

"Has the spell ever worked?"

"Once." Flora looked down at her hands. "I could try the spell with a different sacrifice and a different condition, but this is the easiest combination."

"I'll take the odds. It's not like we have any other real choice. Three o'clock you say?"

"Kyle – tell no-one."

"Of course not. Until tomorrow," he said quietly, shaking Flora's hand as she left the cottage.

"Until tomorrow."


	12. The spell

Kyle wandered around the top of the hill and looked down at the city below. Sunrise was an hour away, but he could sense that the air was changing in preparation for the coming day. The thought that this could be his last day on Earth passed through his mind briefly – he was still wondering if this was the only logical course of action. Suppose that the spell went wrong – he and Flora could both die and Far Far Away would lose one of the three good fairies and their last line of defence. If the spell succeeded, he would have Dama back in his arms, but what had she already been through? He knew that Dama had been dead for some months – what had the afterlife been like for a fairy who used her magic for her own ends? Would she resent being dragged kicking and screaming from Elysium, or relieved to be rescued from Hell?

Flora arrived quarter of an hour before sunrise. She marked out a circle on the grass using red chalk dust and drew out an octagon inside the circle with just enough room for herself and Kyle to kneel down inside. At each of the points on the octagon Flora lit a small oil lamp, the flames reaching up in the pink morning glow. The Fairy Godmother's wand was placed with some ceremony into the centre of the octagon. Flora threw some herbs across the circle and chanted under her breath to cleanse the air of any harmful spirits. Finally, she decided that the ground was prepared and turned to Kyle.

"Kneel down in the centre of the octagon," she instructed, "and close your eyes." Kyle did as he was told and felt Flora step up behind him. She laid her hands lightly on his head and started chanting in a language Kyle could not understand. He felt himself shaking as he wondered what would happen if the spell went wrong.

In the valley below, Puss stretched and looked out of the window. He bounded over to the windowsill, reached up and scratched his claws on the windowpane. His sharp, cat eyes picked up movement on the hill. He watched for a while as a faint pink cloud gathered above the heads of two figures, one standing and one kneeling. Then he sprang down to the floor and ran for Shrek's room.

"Boss! Something is happening outside – come and see!" whispered Puss frantically into Shrek's ear. Shrek got up quietly to avoid waking Fiona and the two made their way outside the room to a nearby window. Shrek gasped at the sight of the magical cloud building above the hill and turned to Puss.

"Fetch Donkey and meet me outside the gates in five minutes."

"Si signor!"

"Is there something wrong?" asked Merryweather, standing in the doorway of her guestroom.

"On the hill," said Shrek, running back into his room to dress. Merryweather glanced up at the hill. "Oh no, Flora! You idiot!" She ran to Fauna's door. "Get up – we have to help Flora!"

Flora tightened her grip on Kyle's hair as a breeze started to circle the two in the octagon. Kyle opened his eyes as the breeze quickened to a small hurricane around the two. He looked up at Flora in terror.

"Is this what's supposed to happen?" he shouted above the wind. He couldn't see out of the circle anymore, dust and coloured sparks blocking his view.

"How should I know? I wasn't there when Salazar brought back Carrabosse. That was four hundred years ago!"

"I thought you said you knew what you were doing!"

"Have some faith in me, would you? I read all the available books on this and contacted Carrabosse last night."

"What did she say when you asked for help?"

"Get lost actually, but that's not relevant right now!" Flora looked up into the swirling mass of cloud above them. "Come on..." she whispered. The clouds started to darken to a rich red wine colour before turning black, the pre-dawn light blocked by the clouds. As suddenly as it had started, the wind ceased and Kyle was aware that he was no longer kneeling on grass. The eight oil lamps burned brightly around Kyle and Flora, their light reflecting off the shining black marble floor. Kyle felt as though he was in a large cavern, acutely aware of the silence that enveloped him and the overwhelming feeling of being watched. He felt Flora's hands shaking as she became slowly more terrified by their surroundings. Neither of them spoke for some time, waiting to see what would happen next.

"Hello?" called Flora, her voice shaking.

"Who is it you ask to be returned, fairy?" came a voice from the darkness, sending a chill down both Kyle and Flora's backs. The voice was dry and unfeeling, with undertones that indicated it had been thousands of years old before their world had been created.

"I ask that Dama Fortuna, the former Fairy Godmother of Far Far Away be returned to life."

"You have invoked the rite of _reparare vita _ - who will be the sacrifice?"

"This man."

"He is human – a poor exchange for the Fairy. We refuse," hissed a second voice, a colder and crueler voice than the first. Where the first voice was unfeeling, this second voice emanated hate and hinted at the punishments that would follow if its time were wasted any further.

"Not an exchange," said Flora. "An addition. Just as Salazar offered himself for Carrabosse, this man offers himself for Dama."

"Ah..." moaned the second voice. "Then we may be interested." Kyle thought the voice sounded altogether too hungry for his own liking.

"What condition will you set for this resurrection?" asked the first voice.

"That Dama must be kissed by or kiss her true love by midnight after her resurrection," replied Flora.

"Unacceptable," replied a cold, hollow voice that sounded like a judge might while condemning a prisoner to death. "This man would simply have to kiss the fairy on her return for us to lose."

"I suggest that the fairy have to kiss this man of her own accord, without being told of the condition that rests on their survival," hissed the second voice again. "If she is not told, it is possible that she would not think to kiss her chauffeur on her first day back to life."

"And if she is told of the condition?" asked Flora.

"Then both Dama and Kyle will die," laughed the voice, Kyle noting the way the sound reverberated around the cavern. He was relieved that it was too dark to see the things they were conversing with – he was quite sure no living human could look upon them and ever hope to sleep again.

"If Dama does not kiss Kyle?" asked Flora.

"Then both die."

"If she does kiss Kyle?"

"Both will live their lives to the full and our role in their futures will be done. For now," replied the judge-like voice.

"Why do you ask that this woman be restored?" asked the first voice.

"There is an enemy in our land that can only be defeated by her power. We have no other options," Flora replied. A deathly silence surrounded them. The silence continued for another minute.

"Which enemy?" asked the second voice.

"Simon Debaal," answered Flora. A high pitched screeching started above Kyle and Flora as the voices reacted to the news. Flora lifted her hands and clasped them to her ears protectively, dropping to her knees. Kyle also covered his ears, but both were unable to block out the sound of the voices arguing about what to do next. They were surrounded, thousands of voices screeching in a hundred old and forgotten language about what to do next. Finally the shrieking ended. Flora returned her hands to Kyle's head and stood up.

"She will be returned. For one day only. You have twenty-four hours in which she must fulfil the condition of her resurrection or you both shall find yourselves standing before this council tomorrow night and our judgement then shall not be so in your favour." The dry voice drew breath high above them.

"So, if we should die," started Kyle, "is there an afterlife?" The voices laughed.

"For some, but not you little human. If you should die as a result of this spell, the souls of you and the lady you seek to bring back to life will be ours to torment for the rest of eternity."

"But if we succeed there is an afterlife for when we die of other causes?" persisted Kyle.

"Oh yes," hissed the second voice. "Dear Dama is experiencing one venue for her afterlife right now. Would you care to watch?"

"I think not," scolded the judge's voice. "Our function is to control the passage of souls to, and sometimes from, the afterlife. Not to torment those souls still living. Be warned, little human. Your love has spent time in the lower recesses of Purgatory for her crimes and may not have recovered by the time she returns to you."

"Purgatory," gasped Kyle.

"Will that be all?" asked the dry voice again.

"Yes," said Flora.

"Then you agree to the terms of our agreement Kyle? This is your last chance to leave here a free man," warned the judge.

"I agree. Double-or-quits. Just as Flora explained beforehand. So long as there's a chance for Dama to return."

"Good. A word of advice as you seem to be souls on the side of good," rasped the dry voice.

"What?" asked Flora.

"_Duck..._" said the voice, fading into the distance. Both Kyle and Flora felt a sensation of falling as the light slowly filtered back into their world.

Shrek, Donkey, Puss, Merryweather and Fauna ran up the hillside to find out what Flora was up to. Both fairies had a pretty good idea of what was going on.

"She's done the spell on her own, hasn't she?" said Merryweather. "That stubborn old bint, always taking the initiative to carry out the impressive spells on her own. And after we all decided yesterday not to do this!"

"She lied to us! I do hope she's alright," gasped Fauna.

"What's going on?" asked Shrek.

"We were going to bring Fairy Godmother back to life, but decided the spell was too dangerous. Now it seems Flora has taken it upon herself to carry out the spell," answered Merryweather.

"Great, that's all we need, another mad magical madam running around Far Far Away," muttered Shrek. Up on the hill, the black, swirling hurricane contained inside the circle started to fade to a light salmon pink and stopped spinning. "Oh, it looks like the spell is over!" said Shrek. The sun broke over the horizon, the first rays of sunlight hitting the pink cloud.

"Duck!" shouted Merryweather, pinning Puss and Donkey to the ground. Fauna dived face-first onto the ground, while Shrek tried to lie as flat as possible. The pink cloud glowed as if gathering power from the sunlight, then exploded in a flash of pink dust and coloured sparks, a deafening crack of thunder resonating from within. The dust settled. A deathly silence surrounded the hill.


	13. Resurrection

"Flora?" asked Kyle, his head spinning and his throat choked with dust. "Flora?" The circle around him had been destroyed in the blast, the oil lamps overturned and their fires extinguished. He was aware his hearing was not what it could have been, the ringing in his ears making him dizzy. He shook his head to clear it and staggered to a standing position. Almost immediately he was hit from the side by Flora flying at top speed into him. She hugged him tightly around the shoulders, pinning his arms to his side.

"We did it!" she laughed. "Midnight tonight – she will appear wherever this wand is! Make sure you keep it safe until then! Now off you go – run quickly and don't let anyone see you! I will deal with any questions – hide for today, tomorrow as well if Fairy Godmother agrees that it is safer to do so. In case I do not see you again before this evening – good luck Kyle! Now go!" Flora forced Fairy Godmother's wand into Kyle's hand and sent him off over the hill, away from the direction Shrek and the others were approaching from. Flora turned to face the group marching up the hill and resigned herself to her fate.

Kyle ducked under some bushes and skidded down the side of the hill, trying to hide from any and all prying eyes. It occurred to Kyle that the location of the cottage he had rented would probably be known to Maria, so headed to the only other safe refuge he knew of – the Poisoned Apple pub. He rented a room from Doris, swore her to secrecy, then retreated to his room for the rest of the day.

Flora meanwhile, was facing a grilling about the spell she had just performed.

"Why? You told us it was far too dangerous. Why did you do it?" asked Fauna.

"Because we didn't have any other real choice. And it was too dangerous to risk our lives on. We could have all died if we'd tried the spell together. So I tried it alone – at least then only one of us would die," answered Flora.

"Who helped you?" demanded Fauna.

"No-one. I made myself the sacrifice."

"But I could have sworn..." started Puss, then stopped. If Flora was prepared to lie to her sisters about this spell, perhaps it was better that he keep the fact he had seen two figures on the hill to himself.

"What?" asked Merryweather.

"I could have sworn that she looked far too happy on completing the spell to have just offered herself as a sacrifice," lied Puss.

"Are you sure you did this alone?" asked Merryweather, glaring at her sister and daring her to lie. Flora smiled sweetly and put her hand on Merryweather's shoulder.

"Of course I did it alone – I didn't want to risk anyone else's life – remember?" Merryweather nodded in response and Fauna smiled encouragingly.

"So we just need to keep you safe for the spell to work?" asked Fauna.

"Yes."

"What's the condition?" asked Merryweather.

"I'm not going to tell you that – the more people who know, the harder it will be to keep it a secret from Maria."

"Of course," agreed Merryweather. "That's very sensible, but I'm still not talking to you."

"Fine," answered Flora, glad that the conversation appeared to be over. As the group descended the hill to go for breakfast at the castle, Flora thought about Kyle and hoped he would be safe. Her plan rested on the castle-folk being completely out of the loop when it came to Kyle's involvement in order to keep him as safe as possible. This did of course mean that for the next day thirty-six or so hours, Kyle was on his own.

Kyle watched through the window as the sun descended, marvelling at how the sun's rays retreated over the trees and trying to fix the image of the coloured sky in his mind, aware that this may be the last sunset he would watch. Tomorrow he would be far too busy to worry about sunrise, sunset or any other marvel of nature. He thought about Simon and how the sorcerer's return would harm Far Far Away if he was not stopped. In his mind, Kyle played out all the ways the plan he had hatched with Flora could go wrong. Perhaps Dama would refuse to help Far Far Away. Perhaps she would help and fail to stop Simon. What if she teamed up with Maria and Simon? What if she came back insane? I probably wouldn't notice the difference, thought Kyle, adding a virtual footnote to the worrying scenarios reeling through his mind. Kyle watched his pocket watch as it approached midnight. The minute hand seemed to be slowing down as it crawled through fifteen and then ten minutes. After what felt like an hour, the watch hit five minutes to midnight. He took out the wand from his pocket and placed it into the centre of the floor, clearing as much space around it as possible. As an afterthought, he closed the curtains and checked the lock on the door to ensure some privacy. The minute hand had one minute to go.

Kyle perched on the end of the bed, glancing alternately from the wand to the pocket watch in his hand. The minute hand ticked to midnight. Kyle drew a deep breath, closed his eyes and waited. After ten seconds he exhaled and opened his eyes. Nothing had happened. The quiet ticking of the pocket watch filled the room, emphasising how empty it was. The wand had not stirred, nothing had entered the room. Panicking, Kyle threw open the curtains and checked outside, as if expecting to see Fairy Godmother fluttering outside the window or pacing outside the pub. A bored stray looked up at the window and barked twice, begging to be let in. Kyle closed the curtains and looked back at his watch – two minutes had passed and there was still no sign of Fairy Godmother.

What happens now? I wonder if I did something wrong, thought Kyle. Am I still under contract to those voices? Terrified thoughts about how he was going to explain to Flora that the spell had failed and whether or not they would be able to save the kingdom spun around his mind, his heart pounding in his ears as the adrenaline kicked into action, the remaining logical parts of his mind completely shut down. As he sank back onto the bed he pulled out the pocket watch and looked at the face – five past twelve. He felt tears of despair fill his eyes as he listened to the town bells chiming midnight.

As the last toll of the palace bell faded and while other, lesser clocks fought to catch up, the small star on the end of the wand started to glow. A thin wisp of pink smoke wound upwards from the tip, circling up into a thin pillar of pink clouds. Silver sparks glistened like stars inside the pillar as it grew outwards into a thicker cloud, two foot wide and five feet tall. Kyle watched as the pillar started to turn, noting how with each rotation the pink slowly faded more and more into pastel blue. With a rush of magic energy, the pillar burst outwards, throwing Kyle off the bed and landing him painfully on the floor. The room darkened again to the flickering candlelight he had been watching the time by. He fought to stand, pulling himself up on the bedpost. He looked to the floor where the wand had been placed – Fairy Godmother was standing, her back to Kyle, leaning over to pick up her wand. Kyle watched as she picked up the wand, swished it as though to test it still worked, then reached up to check her hair. On impulse, Kyle rushed over and presented her with the broken glasses he had saved from the night of the wedding feast. Fairy Godmother took them wordlessly and tapped them once with the wand, fixing the broken glass and turning the frame colour back to blue. She positioned them carefully on the end of her nose and looked up.

"Kyle?"

"Yes, Fairy Godmother?"

"Where are we?"

"In the Poisoned Apple pub. A back room. Upstairs."

"Why the..." she started, before a look of comprehension suddenly dawned on her face. One hand flew dramatically to her mouth as memories filtered in about the wedding party, the fight with Shrek and Harold, the wand blast... and what had happened afterwards. She could recall all too vividly exactly what happened to magical beings who used their magic to harm others. Closing her eyes against the unbidden memory of an afterlife she needed to forget, Dama fought tears for a moment. As she stood there, frozen to the spot, Kyle tried to comfort her by slipping an arm around her shoulders.

"Fairy Godmother?" he asked softly. She immediately broke into loud sobs that racked her entire body, forcing her to kneel down as her knees buckled under the strain of retaining and then losing control. Kyle crouched next to her, cradling her in his arms and letting her cry until she finally stopped out of sheer exhaustion. After a few moments, Fairy Godmother dried her eyes, smoothed down her dress and stood, turning to face Kyle.

"Someone brought me back?" Kyle nodded as he answered.

"Flora."

"Really? Why?"

"Um, I'm not sure I'm supposed to..."

"Kyle?"

"Yes?"

"What the bloody hell is going on?"


	14. She's back

Kyle paused as he waited for Fairy Godmother's reaction. It had taken an hour to explain everything to her – what had happened at the party, the arrival of Shrek's friends and the decision of the magical council to involve Maria, the plan Flora had initiated to bring back Dama Fortuna. He had only left out one key detail, which she picked up on instantly.

"Did she use a resurrection spell to bring me back?"

"I was told not to discuss it with you."

"So I suppose you could not tell me what condition I was brought back under or who was the sacrifice?"

"No."

"Is there any point in asking if it was you?"

"No," answered Kyle, keeping his face impassive. He was worried that the fairy would work out the condition and perhaps jeopardise both of their lives. Luckily she gave up this line of enquiry and paced around the small room for a moment.

"I'm impressed by the room Kyle, you obviously put a lot of thought into this. Very chic."

"It was the only place where we wouldn't be followed."

"I hate this pub." She sat in the window, the moonlight highlighting her lavender hair. Kyle forgot himself for a moment and reached over to stroke her hair softly.

"I've missed you," he said quietly. She shrugged him off, turning her head further from him and staring out of the window.

"I know. I still can't quite believe the last thing I said to you was an instruction for a key change."

"Stunning dress though."

"Thank-you." She smiled at Kyle, then yawned behind her hand. "If you don't mind, it's been a rather long night and I would like to get some sleep if I have to fight evil tomorrow."

"Flora suggested you stay out of the way in case Maria finds out you are back before you are ready to fight."

"Okay." Fairy Godmother lay back on the small bed and squirmed uncomfortably. "I'm sure I don't want to know what they've stuffed this mattress with." Kyle laughed and sat down in the armchair next to the bed, feeling sleep steal over him. "Goodnight Kyle."

"Goodnight Dama."

Kyle stretched in the early morning sun, bright rays of light filtering through his eyelids. He opened his eyes and looked up, surprised to see Dama leaning over him, a glowing aura surrounding her. She noticed that he'd woken and that he seemed about to speak. Putting a finger on his lips to silence him, Dama kissed Kyle lightly on the forehead, then once on each cheek. She moved her finger and kissed his lips. Kyle's mind started to reel and he felt himself jump. She'd just met the condition for them both to live! Dama felt the jump, but rather than break off the kiss she deepened it. Kyle returned the kiss and pulled Dama into his lap, completely oblivious to anything around them.

"Bloody hell," gasped Kyle when finally released. He looked up at the now smirking Fairy Godmother. "Good morning beautiful."

"Good morning servant," she answered tartily, placing her hands on her hips and raising a suggestive eyebrow to Kyle.

"Oh you're joking..." he groaned in response.

It was afternoon before Kyle and Dama emerged from the pub. Kyle followed Dama as she walked slowly up the road to the main town. Neither spoke and both were on full alert for any sign of Simon, Maria or indeed anyone else who may be forced to betray their whereabouts. When they reached the last crossroads before the town, Kyle whistled and moments later the trademark pink carriage screeched to a halt in front of him. It looked a little forlorn, as though it had not been washed for some months. This was, of course, the case. Fairy Godmother took one look at it and waved her wand, returning the carriage to pristine condition. Kyle looked a little piqued and he turned to Dama.

"All those hours I spent polishing the carriage... and you could have just waved your little wand and saved me all that hard labour?"

"Yes. But you were employed as my chauffeur darling. What else would you have done while I dealt with the clients? Now be a sweetie and drive over to the old apartment – I take it I still own it?"

"I imagine so. I don't think things have got so bad at the factory that Charming would sell the apartment."

"Things are bad at the factory? How bad?"

"I'll tell you on the way," answered Kyle, holding the door open for Fairy Godmother as she half-hopped and half-flew into the back seat. Kyle closed the door and leaped into the driver's seat, cracking his whip to stir the carriage into life. They sped off towards Fairy Godmother's old apartment on the far side of town, Kyle trying to keep a low profile by flying with the sun behind him to mask the carriage.

In King Harold's castle, Maria Fortuna was discussing the main plan of attack for the next night. She and Fauna were looking at a model of the terrain around the castle while Flora and Merryweather drew up plans for placement of archers and infantry with Harold and Lillian. Fiona and Shrek busied themselves with plans for evacuating the city if the attack should fail.

"This is the valley I will attack from. Your army must close in from behind," instructed Maria.

"How do we know that Simon will be drawn to the valley?" asked Harold.

"We," said Maria indicating Fauna and herself, "will team up to create a large magical disturbance that Simon will find irresistible." Flora looked across at her sister, but Fauna was radiating nothing other than her usual good will. As orders were relayed around the castle to prepare the troops for the next morning, the council broke up for the last time. Flora deftly avoided meeting with Maria and headed for her room.

Back at her old apartment, Fairy Godmother looked around at the dustcloth covered furniture. She'd stayed here on occasion to escape the potions factory, but strangely had never thought to bring Kyle here before. He had dropped her off at the balcony many times but if they had spent the night together it had always been at the small factory apartment and never here. Dama waved her wand and in one movement the dustcovers vanished, the room was cleaned, the windows opened and a dinner for two served on the dining table. Kyle walked up to Fairy Godmother and slipped his arms around her waist.

"Your hair," he started "smells wonderful."

"We should probably have a quick dinner, then you need to fetch the king and queen so we can discuss if I am going to help them."

"You still have doubts?"

"Many. For a start, we wouldn't have had to go through all this if it hadn't been for that blasted ogre." Fairy Godmother tensed up and Kyle thought it best to change the subject.

"You have a fantastic apartment. Why was I not invited earlier?"

"I needed my own space when I had important things to do. Like saving a kingdom," she snapped.

"You're scared aren't you?" said Kyle quietly.

"Of course not."

"Nervous then?" Fairy Godmother walked over to the dining table and started picking at the fruit basket.

"Yes," she whispered.

"What do you want to do?" asked Kyle, holding her by the shoulders.

"I would like us," she started, walking towards him and slipping her arms around his chest, "to sit down and have dinner together. I'm famished!"

The couple enjoyed the dinner, which, when it was finished, cleared itself leaving only a box of chocolates and a bottle of champagne. Kyle sighed.

"Just what I need – half a bottle of bubbly before driving."

"Shall we keep it for later?" asked Fairy Godmother, already hovering near the chocolates. Kyle laughed.

"Yes! Now come with me. I think it would be best to meet with the king and queen at the castle."

"Why?"

"We only have to sneak into the castle once. It's easier than sneaking out – believe me."

"Fine, fine. How do I look?" She spread her arms and forced a twirl. Kyle smirked.

"Awful. Let's go." Kyle whistled the carriage and turned back to the fairy. She seemed to be fretting about something. "You look fantastic. As always. Would I be seen out in public with you if that were not the case?"

"I suppose not. But less of your cheek young man. I'll have you know that chauffeurs are a dime a dozen." She flew out onto the balcony and opened the carriage door.

"That may be the case, but how many can use a whip?" he grinned and leaned over Fairy Godmother.

"We really don't have time for this," she muttered.

"Quick fumble in the back seat?"

"No!" Fairy Godmother pulled the door behind her. "Just drive!"

"I love it when you play hard to get!" Kyle shouted back as he cracked the whip and the carriage headed off.

They arrived at the palace near sunset, Kyle parking just out of sight under the king and queen's balcony. He hopped up and peered around the curtain into the room. King Harold and Queen Lillian were playing chess. Kyle coughed politely.

"Who's there?" asked Lillian, standing and quickly drawing a sword from a dresser behind her. "Show yourself!" Kyle stepped forward. "You're Kyle aren't you?"

"Yes your majesty. I have brought someone to speak with you."

"Who is it?"

"Fairy Godmother Dama Fortuna." Kyle waited for the reaction.

"What!" shouted Harold.

"How?" asked Lillian.

"Flora brought her back using a resurrection spell."

"Shrek told us, but we thought it hadn't worked. Where is she?" asked Lillian.

"Right here," replied Fairy Godmother, stepping through the curtains. Both Harold and Lillian froze for a moment before Harold spoke.

"Why are you here?"

"To discuss the possibility of helping you out of this mess." She looked down and came to a decision. "I'm sorry I hurt you both."

"It's going to take more than that, but not a bad start," said Lillian.

"Will you help us?" asked Harold.

"Possibly. What incentive do I have to help?"

"We'd be eternally grateful. We might even overlook your blatant attempt to take over the country," said Lillian.

"Perhaps I could be persuaded to help out."

"But how could we ever trust you again?" Lillian and Fairy Godmother were now face to face, neither able to back down.

"Harold?" said Dama.

"Yes?" croaked Harold.

"Do you fancy being human again?"

"Yes, but wouldn't that alert Maria to your presence?"

"She was never very bright, but I take your point. Perhaps later then."

"No, I think now would be the perfect time," replied a voice from the door. It was Maria.


	15. Confrontation

Both Maria and Dama drew their wands.

"Go back to your cave Maria – I don't want to have to kill you."

"Why should you want to kill me? I'm the good one, remember? How Fiona and Shrek will thank me for killing you when they find out you burst in here and took out your revenge on the King and Queen." Maria whirled around to face Harold and Lillian, waving her wand in front of them menacingly.

"Leave them alone Maria!" warned Kyle, drawing a sword. Maria chuckled quietly.

"Did you expect that to work? Had he told you what the condition was yet dear sister?"

"What condition?"

"Oh, the resurrection spell that he and Flora carried out. He offered himself for you."

"Kyle why?" asked Dama, then stopped herself.

"Oh, so you weren't told? I suppose you don't know the condition either then, as Flora did say that if you were told before the condition was met you would die instantly." Dama closed her eyes as she realised that a few words from her sister would kill her.

"I don't believe Flora would have betrayed us like that!" shouted Kyle.

"Oh she didn't do so willingly. You can keep your original romantic idea of Flora as the brave warrior who would die before betraying you. In fact, she almost did. Her last thoughts were of you Kyle and she hoped you would succeed. That's what betrayed your cause."

"You killed her?" gasped Dama.

"I didn't intend to. She'd have made a much better servant than corpse, but she was so unwilling to let go of vital information. I had to destroy most of her mind before she gave up your secret Kyle."

"Why did you go after Flora? Only a few people knew she'd performed the spell!" Kyle fought his fears, trying to buy time for Dama to get around to silencing her sister. If the spell hadn't been sealed, they were both precariously close to death.

"And of those few, one in particular has been on my side from the start. Which reminds me, I shall be back in a moment." Maria waved her wand and turned the balcony curtains into solid doors that locked automatically preventing any escape through that route. She walked out of the bedroom door, and turned in the hallway.

"I hope you won't mind me leaving for a moment, only I'd hate to witness the death of a family member. The condition was that you should kiss him by midnight tonight, ciao," she closed the door quickly and locked it magically behind her. There was a collective intake of breath, then Dama smiled.

"Is that all?" she asked Kyle.

"Yes," he replied, walking over to hug her quickly.

"Then I take it you two have, ah, already, um, kissed?" asked Harold, knowing the answer.

"Amongst other things," mumbled Dama quietly. She raised her wand, waiting for Maria's re-entrance. Kyle picked up a sword, as did Lillian. Harold hopped out of sight.

Maria burst through the door dragging the body of Flora behind her. Kyle took a swing at her with his sword, but the swipe was blocked by a counter-curse. It certainly hadn't come from Maria. Dama gaped as she saw Fauna walking in behind Maria, wand raised to prevent Kyle causing Maria any harm.

"I told you I should come along," said Fauna.

"Yes, you were right. I needed help." Maria turned and saw Dama still standing. "Still here? How?" Dama rolled her eyes.

"Use your imagination," she drawled, pointing her wand at Maria. "Leave her body alone at least," she said, pointing briefly at Flora. "And you have some serious explaining to do when Merryweather finds out what you've done," she observed, glaring at Fauna. "Why did you help her do this?" Fauna looked uncomfortable.

"It wasn't supposed to go this far. Flora was always pushing me aside and trying to control everything I did. Maria offered me a chance to be my own master again."

"Provided you serve under Simon."

"No! Once this kingdom is under Simon's control he will let Maria and I leave to pursue our own destinies."

"And you believe that do you?"

"Yes. Flora's death was an accident, you have to believe that."

"I don't have to believe a word you say. You and Flora were always so close, why do this?"

"Simon treated your sister very well when they worked together. He has always been supportive of magical folk."

"If you followed everything he said, yes. Personally, I never liked the way he treated me."

"You were his enemy," interrupted Maria.

"Didn't you ever wonder why Maria? How can you tell me what he did to Linavia was right in any way?" Fairy Godmother fluttered off the floor in her frustration. "You sided with him to get back at me and you know it!"

"So what if I did? He's back and you know you won't be able to fight all three of us this time around. I guess your magic isn't back up to full strength yet is it Dama? Me, Simon and Fauna against a rogue Fairy Godmother out to destroy Far Far Away. Who do you think the people will believe Dama? Do you think they'll believe you came here to help tonight? Or to kill the royal family? And look – Flora was named your successor as Far Far Away's new official fairy godmother this morning. Look how you treated her. I didn't want to kill you myself Dama, I rather thought that Flora's spell would do that for me. Never mind, I shall rectify that mistake," Maria threw a quick stunning curse at Dama, which she dodged easily.

"You'll have to try harder than that Maria," replied Dama, throwing a curse back at her.

"Do you have to kill each other?" asked Fauna.

"You know the plan – she'll never co-operate and Simon will arrive tomorrow expecting to walk into a city empty of its soldiers. She has to die. It's Flora's fault really – you did well to persuade her not to bring back Dama. It's a pity she changed her mind."

"You don't have to help her Fauna," said Lillian.

"Quiet you!" Maria hit Lillian mid-stomach with a curse. Lillian was thrown back onto the bed, while Fauna and Kyle gasped in astonishment. The sword Lillian had been holding clattered to the floor, breaking the temporary silence. Dama did not wait for a second attack from Maria but went straight for her sister with a killing blast. Maria did not see the spell coming and for a moment it looked like Dama may have won. However Fauna pushed Maria out of the way and took the full hit of the spell herself, crumpling to the floor. Dama looked aghast – she'd never killed anyone relatively innocent before.

"No!" screeched Dama. She lowered her wand to her side and started to shake with the horror of what she'd just done. Maria looked down at Fauna and shook her head. Then she advanced on Dama.

Dama looked at her sister and braced herself for another attack. Both were now cursing to kill and a furious dog-fight began in earnest. Dama dodged a curse from Maria, only to overbalance and drop her wand. She watched helplessly as it clattered away across the floor and Maria landed between the wand and Dama.

"You lose," whispered Maria, raising her wand. Dama closed her eyes, trying to will her wand to her hand knowing it wouldn't work. She waited for the inevitable curse. When it didn't come, she looked up at her sister. Maria was frozen, her wand raised above her head. Dama felt herself relax as a trickle of blood flowed down from Maria's mouth.

Kyle stepped out from behind Maria, blood on the sword he was holding. As Maria fell forward into her sister's arms, Kyle snatched her wand and snapped it in half. Dama looked impassively into her sister's eyes for a moment, then stroked Maria's face gently and closed her still-staring eyes. She stood and looked at Kyle, who dropped his sword.

"Thank-you," she whispered. Kyle wrapped his arms around her as she buried her face in his chest and Harold jumped out from under the bed.

"My God – Lillian!" croaked Harold. Kyle and Dama rushed to the queen's side.

"She's still breathing," said Dama. "It's just a stunning spell – it'll wear off by morning."

"Can't you do anything for her now?"

"Yes, just a moment," sighed Dama, gesturing over Lillian's prone body for a moment. Lillian woke up and pulled herself upright. She took in the scene around her.

"I see you won." Lillian rubbed her arms, still feeling a little numb.

"Yes. I think I've decided to help you defeat Simon. Now that the odds are a little more even that is." She looked down at Maria. "It wasn't supposed to end like this..."

"It never is. I wonder why Fauna turned against Flora?"

"Perhaps Merryweather will know?" suggested Harold, hopping into his wife's lap.

"We shall have to tell her what's happened. Kyle, could you go and call some guards please?" asked Lillian. Kyle half-bowed and left the room. There was a moment's awkward silence.

"I'm sorry about your sister," said Lillian.

"Thank-you. About the plan to marry Charming to Fiona..."

"Yes?" Lillian raised an eyebrow.

"I hope you realise I was only trying to make a good match for both of our children."

"Particularly your son."

"Granted. But perhaps my methods were a little over-the-top."

"You damn near killed both Shrek and my husband. I think perhaps 'over-the-top' is too mild a phrase to use in the circumstances."

"I apologise for my actions. Unreservedly. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

"Yes, actually," replied Lillian. Harold nodded in agreement. "So, what are we going to do tomorrow?"

"What we are going to do _tonight_ is to recall the army and fasten the gates of the city," said Dama. "Tomorrow we are going to pray that I can convince Merryweather to help fight Simon so I at least have some back-up." At that moment, Kyle re-entered with some guards and Fiona and Shrek. "Kyle?"

"Yes Dama?"

"Go and find my son and bring him here."

"Of course." Kyle exited through the curtains, which were now freed from Maria's earlier curse. Dama followed him to, ahem, say good-bye.

"Mother – what happened?" asked Fiona. Lillian took her daughter's hands in hers.

"Sit down, both of you," she said, beckoning to Shrek. "We have a lot to discuss."


	16. Lack of control

It was early the next morning and Lillian pushed open the bedroom door quietly.

"This was Maria's room, but it doesn't look like she has left much for you to search through. She certainly didn't bring much luggage." Lillian and Dama entered the room and closed the door behind them.

"And you're sure that no-one has been in here or tampered with anything?" asked Dama.

"I'm sure."

"Let's start searching. Anything unusual. A bunch of herbs – a bundle of twigs next to the fire. She always did like flower magic." Dama started searching through a dresser, rummaging through her sister's clothes looking for anything that may lead her to Simon. After half an hour, Lillian called out to Dama.

"Is this what we're looking for?" Lillian held out five glass orbs, each the size of a small orange. Three orbs were glowing with a blue light, the other two were black inside.

"Could be," said Dama smiling grimly. "Pass me one of the blue ones." Lillian did so and Dama held the orb in her hand for a moment, then passed her wand over the top of the orb. A few mumbled words later and the orb turned from a smoky blue to a dusky pink. The name "Lillian" appeared, etched onto the glass surface. "So that's how she was doing it," said Dama.

"Doing what?"

"Reading your mind Lillian."

"I thought she did that when she touched my arm?"

"No. That just finalised the spell. To use this type of magic, Maria would have needed to prepare a spell over this orb, then touch you as she said the final word of the spell."

"Which is?"

"Heart. I've used the spell myself once. After completing the spell, she would be able to read your mind just by holding this orb to her head. And, if you were a weak minded individual, she could have controlled your actions as well. You have been unwell recently?"

"Yes."

"Headaches?"

"Yes – what of it?"

"She was probably trying to force you to do something when the headache started. I'm impressed you fought her off."

"I felt like my head was being compressed by an invisible force, but that happened many times..."

"How many and when?"

"The night after Maria met with the council. Again the next morning and last night just before she came into the room."

"Then I was right. She was trying to control you. And this should be destroyed!" Dama lifted the glass orb above her head and smashed it against the floor. Lillian gasped and staggered a little. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. Thank-you. I think," she held her head, wondering if it was painful because a new headache had started or because an old one had ended.

"Pass me one of the black ones." Lillian gave her one of the orbs. Again, Dama waved her hand over it and the orb flickered to a deep red colour as the name 'Flora' etched itself onto the glass. "She must have used this while interrogating Flora." Dama dropped the orb to the floor, breaking it. "And I guess the next one is Fauna's," she said, taking the last black orb into her hand. Sure enough, the name Fauna scrawled across the glass. "I knew she'd never betray her sister." Dama pitched the orb at the wall and it shattered upon impact. "She made me kill an innocent."

"You had no choice. It was an accident."

"It counts. Trust me on this." She lifted one of the two blue orbs and tapped it irritably with her wand. 'Merryweather' formed on the glass.

"Where is she?" asked Lillian.

"I don't know. But I can find out." Dama held the orb to her head and closed her eyes. "In the dungeon. In one of the cells. When I break this, she'll be released from the spell. You should go down and explain things to her. I'll break the orb in about ten minutes to give you time to reach her."

"Alright. But who is controlled by the last orb?" Lillian and Dama looked expectantly at the last glass ball. Dama passed her wand over it and cried out as the name formed. As Dama fled from the room, Lillian picked up the orb. The surface was decorated in a flowing italic script that formed the name 'Prince Charming.'

* * *

**Sorry it's been so long between updates and that this is just a quickie. Chapter 17 is coming up soon!**


	17. Alliance with Merryweather

Lillian found Dama in the guest-room they had set aside for her work. She was panicked, but not crying as yet. Lillian waited while the fairy calmed herself down.

"Give me that orb," said Dama. Lillian handed it over and Dama held the orb to her head. For a moment, nothing happened then her eyes flew open and she stared open-mouthed at something in the distance. Lillian realised that whatever the fairy was looking at, it was not in this room. Dama shook herself and looked down at the ball in her hand. "I can't release him. He's in Simon's court – a mindless slave still under Maria's influence and doing everything Simon tells him to! If I free him, Simon will realise that Charming's no longer a mindless idiot and kill him instantly!" Lillian put an arm around Dama to comfort her and fought back the phrase 'you're sure Simon would notice the difference?'

"At least let's free Merryweather. And your link to your son may lead us to Simon." Dama nodded and gently placed the orb she was holding into a pocket. She took up Merryweather's orb.

"Go down to the dungeons. Merryweather will need your support Lillian. Charming will be safe so long as Simon believes he's still under Maria's spell." As Lillian ran out, Dama walked to the window and looked out. Somewhere out there, her son was in the same room as her old enemy – a man who had held nations under his control until she had finally defeated him. But now he was back and she was not altogether convinced she could beat him a second time. Particularly if the life of her son was hanging in the balance. She looked down at the glass orb in her hand and traced the name Merryweather with her finger. It was a small hope that Merryweather would be able to help, but a hope none the less. She held the orb out of the window and let go, watching as the glass glinted in the morning light and smirking at the sound of breaking glass. Somewhere in the dungeons, a woman screamed.

Meanwhile, Shrek and Harold looked over a map of the kingdom. Highlighted in red push-pins were all the recorded sightings of Simon or of those who had been affected by his magic. A large circle surrounded the walled city, with the newer pins coming dangerously close to the walls.

"Not good," said Shrek as he studied the map. "Not good at all." Harold stepped up next to him and pointed at a pin just a few centimetres from the model wall – in reality, just less than a mile from the castle.

"This was the latest report. A woodcutter's family were seen tearing down trees at lightning speed. When questioned, they would give no answer and even turned against our guards that were sent to investigate. They are now in the dungeon."

"I know," said a voice from the door. "And next time you're thinking about imprisoning some cursed in our own home do you think you could mention it to me first?" Lillian stormed up to the table.

"Sorry dear," said Harold, reaching his arm behind his neck and glancing at the floor nervously.

"I forgive you." Lillian fussed with Harold's collar a moment before touching her nose to his and kissing him lightly. Shrek tried not to look and busied himself with studying the map.

"Good morning Harold," said Dama, flouncing into the room.

"Good morning."

"Good morning," said Shrek, trying to smile encouragingly. Then he tried to smile welcomingly. When neither worked he grinned sheepishly and turned back to the map.

"Good morning ogre," replied Dama coolly. "We need to find Simon. I think he's in a castle or tower of some sort and it must be nearby."

"There's an old watchtower," said Harold, striding around the table and pointing out the tower with a finger.

"You're getting used to this being human again thing aren't you Harold?" Lillian smiled at her husband.

"Yes I am dear. And thank-you by the way," he turned to Dama, "I really wasn't expecting you to do this for me," he gestured down his body.

"A deal's a deal. I help you become human and you help me to find a wife for my son. I'm still going to hold you to that, even if Fiona is already married and you have to find another princess for Charming."

"I'm sure he could find someone himself Dama," said Lillian. "Perhaps it is best not to meddle."

"I'm not meddling, I'm helping."

"How many times have we heard that before," quipped Merryweather as she entered the room. "The queen very kindly told me of the fate of my sisters and what you did to Maria. How can I help you to defeat Simon?"

"I'm not sure yet. First we have to find him. By then, I should have worked out some way of beating him at his own game. But before I try to take on Simon, I need to rescue my son."

"I've just thought of another problem," said Lillian.

"What?"

"Didn't you send Kyle out to find Charming last night?" There was an uncomfortable silence.

"Does anyone have a crystal ball I can borrow?" said Dama calmly.

"In my room," answered Merryweather.

"Take me there now. And I will need all the information you have on that watchtower Harold. Blueprints, floorplans, whatever you have." She followed Merryweather out of the room. A pregnant pause.

"Should I tell her I have nothing other than a vague idea of where the watchtower is?"

"Probably not yet dear," answered Lillian.

In Merryweather's room, Dama was trying the magical equivalent of dialling a mobile 'phone number when you've forgotten the last three digits and know there's a six in there somewhere. Finally, after many wrong numbers, she saw Kyle's face surrounded by what appeared to be heavy snowfall through the clouds in the ball and shouted out to him.

"Kyle? It's me. Get back to the castle."

"But I haven't found him yet."

"You're not going to. Where are you?"

"North-west of the castle. Some villagers said they saw Charming riding this way a few weeks ago."

"Well done. Now get back here quickly!"

"Of course. Love you!"

"Love you too," she answered, ending the call with a swish of her wand. She saw the look on Merryweather's face. "Oh be quiet," she muttered.

"I didn't say a word. Snow?"

"The mountains. He should be back in an hour."

"Why did you install a crystal ball on the carriage?"

"Let's just say it's come in useful sometimes."

"What now?"

"Now we find out where the watchtower is and form a battle-plan."

"Can we win?" asked Merryweather. She bit her bottom lip and looked up at Dama. "I need to know my sisters did not die in vain – that we will defeat Simon and free the others."

"We can but try," answered Dama, heading downstairs to meet with the new war council.


	18. The watchtower

**Sorry it's been so long since updating - a combination of mum being in and out of hospital for the last month and preparing for OFSTED in school. More soon!!!**

* * *

Merryweather crunched through the snow and blinked furiously as the strong wind forced snowflakes into her face. It was bitterly cold and in deference of this fact she was bundled up in a fur cloak and fur-lined boots. Because she was Merryweather, the clothes had been enchanted to appear bright blue. Ahead of her, she could just make out the outline of Fairy Godmother, beating out a trail in front of them. The two had left Kyle and the carriage in a copse of trees an hour behind them, making their way on foot to avoid alerting Simon to their presence by the use of anything magical.

"Just one warming spell?" begged Merryweather, another gust of wind stealing her voice and sending it out to the night.

"No! The watchtower is over this rise – if we keep going at this rate we should reach it by sunset. Now come on!" Fairy Godmother pulled her white cloak around her a little closer. Rather sensibly, she'd opted for camouflage rather than fashion when styling her cloak. Merryweather stood out like a sore thumb against the grey and white landscape. Fairy Godmother reached the tip of the rise and crouched down, surveying the landscape in front of her. Merryweather crawled next to her, panting slightly.

"Remind me again why we told Kyle not to come with us?"

"Because someone needed to guard the carriage."

"I could have guarded the carriage."

"I need you to help me. Now quiet." She raised a hand to shelter her eyes from the glare of sunlight against snow, trying to peer through the snowstorms. Fairy Godmother knew that the storm was not natural – the glare of the winter sun contrasting with the furious snowstorm around them. The sky above them was clear – had this been a natural storm there would be clouds blocking their light and making their journey impossible. "He really doesn't want company does he?" muttered Fairy Godmother, searching the valley below for any signs of life.

"Are you sure we can do this?"

"No."

"Then why are we here? Harold's plan was much more sensible. Why didn't you do as he asked?"

Both fell silent for a moment. At the war council, it had been decided to send Harold's army north to the mountains, descending on the watchtower en masse. Given the time needed to gather supplies and move a large number of people across a country and through mountains, it would have been a month at least before they had even found the tower. The night after the council Merryweather had been woken up by a very nervous Fairy Godmother, who had somehow convinced her to leave and head for the mountains that moment. By dawn, Kyle had dropped off Fairy Godmother and Merryweather and had orders to stay hidden in the trees until their return. Fairy Godmother turned back to Merryweather.

"Because Charming could be dead by the time Harold gets here." She scanned the landscape again, edging forward over the rise and trying to control her descent over the ridge. Her wings were almost useless in this weather, offering little support as she stumbled, slid and tripped her way down the slope. As she reached the bottom, she scanned the valley again and saw a dark shadow to the east. "Bingo," she whispered. The wind was quiet down in the valley, the storm obviously designed to keep intruders out of what appeared to be a calm and pleasant glaciated plain, covered in snow this late in autumn. Merryweather came crashing down behind her, cursing and complaining as she drew closer. "That's right Merryweather, as stealthily as you can so we don't get caught."

"It's not my fault I fell over!" shouted Merryweather. Her voice echoed around the cliffs surrounding them. "Oops," she added quietly.

"Oops indeed if we get caught. Onward!"

The two fairies trekked on, using ridges of ice and snowdrifts as cover while they approached the shadow in the distance. As they drew closer, they saw the shadow take the form of a tall tower, shielded from the snowfall in the mountains by a steep sloped roof. The grey stone reflected the sunlight dimly, hiding the tower against the mountain behind. A treeless expanse spread out in front of them – there would be nothing to give cover to the two travellers as they commenced the final approach to the tower.

"What did you tell Kyle to do if we didn't return?"

"Wait three days and then go and warn Harold," whispered Fairy Godmother.

"So there's no chance of a rescue?"

"None." She looked out at the watchtower again. Much to Merryweather's surprise, she stood and strode purposefully towards the tower, signalling Merryweather to keep quiet and follow her. Whimpering slightly, Merryweather scampered to catch up with the older fairy. They reached the tower wall without incident and with some relief rested their backs against it, flattening themselves to avoid being seen from the windows.

"If you'd care to explain?" started Merryweather.

"Look back to where we were hiding," panted Fairy Godmother. As Merryweather did so, she was forced to cover her eyes. The sun was lower in the sky now, the rays slicing across the land almost at ground level. She could barely make out the ground, let alone their hiding place. Anyone trying to look west would not have seen the fairies, the glare from the snow blinding any guard.

"Clever."

"Thank-you."

"Now where?"

"Well I was thinking the door may come in useful..." Fairy Godmother edged around the tower until she saw a small wooden door, which was wedged open with a guard posted either side. "Try not to act afraid," she whispered to Merryweather. She stood away from the wall, smoothed down her dress and walked up to the guards, who did not flinch or blink as she walked between them and into the tower. Merryweather followed, sweating profusely under the fur cloak. She saw Fairy Godmother dart into a side-room and followed suit.

"How?"

"It's Simon's enchantment. If we'd challenged the guards, they'd have attacked us. But as with all the cursed, if you ignore them, they will ignore you unless ordered to attack by Simon. I'm guessing Simon is at the top of the tower."

"How do you know?"

"I don't. It just fits with the stereotypical evil sorcerer image."

"Okay. Lead on."

"After you."

The top of the watchtower widened, giving the impression from a distance that the tower was a large birdbath someone had fitted a roof to. As the fairies ascended the tower, various cursed servants walked past them, each scurrying to complete an errand for their master, each unaware of their surroundings or selves beyond that which was necessary to complete the task in hand. Up ahead, they saw a larger, ornate door that had been decorated with a tree motif long ago.

"And in the dark, dark mountains, in the dark, dark tower, up the dark, dark stairs, there was a dark, dark door. And behind the dark, dark, door..." whispered Fairy Godmother to Merryweather, making her jump and sending chills down her spine. She held her hand over her mouth to stop herself shrieking and closed her eyes to calm down for a second. As she opened them, she saw Fairy Godmother raising her hand to the door. For a moment, the older fairy did not move. Then Fairy Godmother rapped smartly on the door three times. The door opened of its own accord and both fairies walked into the room.

A fire burned brightly in the fireplace, next to which a pair of Akita dogs lay curled up and asleep. A dining table held the remnants of a rich feast, reminding the fairies how long it had been since they had eaten. A wooden throne faced the door, on which a young man of nineteen sat, his eyes twinkling with mirth as he watched the two fairies. The boy wore a scarlet robe, trimmed in gold, with a pointed hat. Peculiarly, he also wore thick-rimmed glasses and had a strange goatee-like red beard. Merryweather felt herself about to laugh at the idea of being scared of this child, but then looked back to his eyes and realised what a dangerous thing laughing might be. The boy removed the glasses and handed them to a servant who stood facing the wall behind the throne. His eyes were completely black, and reflected no light from the room. As she stared, Merryweather was sure she could see stars behind those eyes and felt herself falling forward. Fairy Godmother coughed and Merryweather shook herself mentally, re-focusing on reality.

"And how might I help you Dama?"

"Simon – where is my son?"

"Right here," he clicked his fingers at the servant to his right, who turned and stared at Fairy Godmother. The servant was indeed Prince Charming, his brilliant blue eyes glazed over, his mind still under Maria's spell.

"Release him. And leave the kingdom of Far Far Away alone."

"Retreat now when I am so close to victory?"

"Yes. I see you have fed well – though I'm not sure your old glasses suit a child so young."

"One of the trials of my life I'm afraid, constantly trying to find a wardrobe that suits a man who can reverse his ageing."

"Give me back my son. Retreat from Far Far Away."

"And in return?"

"I might not kill you."

"Retreat from absolute victory and lose a servant, or fight you, Dama. Is that the bargain you wish to strike with me?"

"Yes Simon. What is it to be?"

"Neither. Charming, dispose of these intruders." Prince Charming drew his sword and advanced towards the two fairies, Merryweather clinging to Fairy Godmother in terror as they both backed away. The door had closed and neither fairy needed to test it to know that it would only open again on Simon's command. On his throne, Simon relaxed back and smiled at the scene before him. "Choose," he said softly, "is it more important to kill me, or save your son? To do the former you must kill Charming in order to attack me. To do the latter simply allow him to kill you and I will let Charming go free. Choose."

****


	19. Simon the Sorcerer

**Yes, I do read Discworld and I doff my hat to Granny Weatherwax and Terry Pratchett for the creation of headology...**

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Fairy Godmother raised her wand in front of her and faced Charming. 

"Pigeon? Can you hear me?" Charming raised his sword and swung clumsily towards his mother. She parried it with a flash from her wand, relieved to see his old skill with a sword was not at Simon's command. Charming slashed out again and again Fairy Godmother moved the sword aside easily with a flick of her wand.

"Boring," interjected Simon. He clicked his fingers and the other servant drew a sword and advanced on Fairy Godmother. She found herself backing away from both the attackers, trying to defend against two swords with only one wand.

"Merryweather?"

"Yes Fairy Godmother?"

"Do you still have the crystal ball I told you to keep safe at all costs?"

"Yes. What of it?"

"Take it out and toss it to me," Fairy Godmother flew upwards and darted out of Charming's reach for a moment, ducking slightly behind Simon's throne. As Merryweather threw the ball to Dama, Simon reached out a lazy hand and caught it, crushing the glass into powder in his hand as Dama knew he would.

"More of your party tricks Dama?" he drawled.

"Maria's actually," replied Fairy Godmother. She moved in front of Simon, blocking his view of Charming and the servant. "You really should have looked more closely at that ball before destroying it." She crossed her hands in front of her chest, then looked down and summoned up as much power as she could muster. Behind her, Charming shook his head, dazed and feeling stupid. As the world came back into focus, he remembered a messenger telling him to ride north to a tower where his aunt would meet him and help him out of the financial mess he'd landed the potions factory in. He'd met with Maria, but couldn't remember what happened next. He looked down and saw the sword in his hand. When he looked up, a man was standing in front of him, also brandishing a sword. Charming acted instinctively and slashed out towards the man in front of him, who turned and blocked the attack. With an unforeseen clarity of movement, the servant started to attack Charming who, with his hero's instincts now concentrating solely on staying alive, fought back.

Fairy Godmother looked up and met Simon's gaze.

"Now this is interesting – what's next?" He swept his hand in front of him, unbalancing Fairy Godmother and sending the other three spinning against the far wall. "So your power has increased," he said thoughtfully.

"Of course. I didn't spend the last thirty years in a stone pillar." She pushed her hands out in front of her, the gesture summoning a spell that forced Simon back against the throne. He gasped as the spell took hold, crushing him against the throne. Shouting in pain, Simon struggled free, only to be pinned again by Fairy Godmother. "Merryweather – take over!" she instructed. Merryweather picked up the holding spell, freeing Fairy Godmother to take on the challenge of disposing of Simon once and for all.

Charming parried a blow from the servant, then reached out and grasped the man by the throat. The servant choked, then dropped his sword. As he started to turn blue, Charming thrust his sword through the servant and let him drop. The man writhed for a moment, then lay still. Charming dropped his sword and rubbed his eyes blearily. He staggered back and scanned the room. He saw Merryweather in a blue cloak, but recognised her only as a fairy, never having met her before. He vaguely recognised Simon – as one would a random face from a dream. The woman in front of Simon was wearing a long white cloak, but the lavender hair was unmistakable.

"Mother?" he cried, just as Fairy Godmother was transferring the holding spell to Merryweather. As Merryweather grimaced under the strain of holding Simon in place, Fairy Godmother turned and saw her son looking at her. "Mother – I thought you were dead?"

"I was pigeon, but I cannot explain now. Do you remember the stories I used to tell you of Simon Debaal?"

"Yes Mummy. Is it really you?" he felt tears filling his eyes, unable to think of anything but the pain tearing at his heart.

"That man is Simon Debaal. I have to kill him. Whatever happens – stay safe." She touched Charming's face briefly, then turned back to Simon. "Alright you bastard." She touched her hands either side of Simon's face, bringing her face level with his and staring into the pitiless depths of his eyes. She searched for his mind and felt it resisting her entry. Finally, as if she had backed the physical Simon into a corner, his mind weakened and she broke through, controlling him. "Change," she whispered. In her mind, she saw an image of the two of them standing on the plain outside at night, the only two people in a silent world. The mental image of Simon crouched before her, while she stood, hand raised in a warding gesture, trying to change him into something she could kill.

Merryweather watched as Fairy Godmother slipped into a trance, eyes locked with Simon's. The holding spell Merryweather was trying to maintain was fading, but she held her concentration until she saw Simon's hands grow limp and collapse into his lap. She walked over to Charming.

"It's nearly over now, prince. Nearly over."

"What's going on?" he groaned.

"Maria put a spell on you and forced you to act as guard for Simon. Your mother killed Maria and we made our way here to kill Simon. She's trying to make him mortal enough to kill – Simon's a devious old man and we can't assume he'd stay dead if we simply ran him through with a sword. She intends to drain him of magical power first."

"How?"

"Only she knows that."

"Oh." Charming looked to his mother again, then walked up and leaned against the throne next to both Simon and his mother. He reached out and stroked his mother's hair softly, feeling the tense grief of the last few months return as he looked at her unblinking face. He looked back to Merryweather.

"Who are you?"

Inside Simon's mind, Fairy Godmother fought to find a way to defeat him. She sorted through broken memories of his time trapped inside the pillar, realising that the prison would have crumbled with time even without her death, only to release the poison inside. She saw the answer flash in front of her briefly – she would have to make him mortal, steal his power by force and make him human. Only then could she be sure that he would remain dead once killed. Her mental self reached out and took the mental self of Simon by the hair, pulling upwards as she tried to pull his power from him. But Simon resisted her and she felt the challenge, her mental self letting go of Simon's hair in exhaustion. On the starless plain inside Simon's mind, Simon's mental image laughed at Fairy Godmother's weakness. Terrified, trying to avoid being caught, her image turned and ran from the plain, trying to escape Simon's mind and return to her own. But Simon was too strong, and Fairy Godmother felt herself fall back into her mind, trying in vain to block Simon's entry.

Charming saw his mother take a sharp intake of breath and watched as her face contorted into a pained grimace. He called over Merryweather and they both watched anxiously, worrying in case Fairy Godmother lost this final battle.

Inside her own mind, Fairy Godmother gathered her thoughts and turned to face Simon. This time they faced each other on a field of grass, Simon's self-image reasserting itself as a strong, middle-aged wizard in a red robe, while Fairy Godmother appeared in her trademark blue dress. Simon grinned, drew his hand through the long grass, stimulating a host of memories in a blur of information. She saw her childhood flash through her mind, her own death, then saw Charming's first few steps. A meeting with an old witch went through her mind, followed by an image of Shrek on a white horse. She sank to her knees under the strain, looking up in surrender. Simon advanced and took her hair in his hand.

"I shall enjoy this," he hissed. Fairy Godmother thought over what she'd done so far. She had tried to force power from a sorcerer. She had nearly died fighting him last time. Perhaps this time force wouldn't work. The answer came to her and she felt her strength return. She pushed herself up, Simon involuntarily losing his grip on her hair as she did so. She looked up and raised a hand.

"You have no power here Simon. I know my own mind and will not be trapped here." A wave of her hand and Simon was gone, returned to his own consciousness.

Merryweather saw both Simon and Fairy Godmother flinch and blink as they came around. Almost immediately, Simon raised his hands and gripped Fairy Godmother around the throat. Charming tried to hit Simon to distract him, but the blow was unheeded and certainly didn't slow Simon down as he flew across the room and pinned Fairy Godmother to the wall.

"You lose," he spat. Fairy Godmother closed her eyes and thought back to her training years, reminded thanks to Simon of the old witch who had believed in headology, the magic of the mind, where convincing someone they were a frog and sending them hopping around the garden while still human was quite possible.

"Didn't you know that mortals are not permitted to touch a fairy unless invited?"

"I am no mortal."

"Oh yes, you are." Fairy Godmother raised her hands, a powerful spell flaming in her hands. Simon released her and made a shield to block the spell. When Fairy Godmother released the spell however, it was to her that the shards of light sped, casting an aura around her. "You are a mortal," she repeated to Simon, smiling as he shook.

"No, I'm Simon and I'm a sorcerer..."

"Are you calling me a liar?"

"No, I couldn't. But I'm not a mortal."

"Then what are you? I say you are a mortal – what are you?"

"I am a sorcerer." The certainty was draining from his voice and the aura of power around him was diminishing. The spell Fairy Godmother had cast upon herself was one of glamour, where anyone she spoke to directly would believe anything she told them. Despite being a powerful sorcerer, Simon was becoming convinced he was a mortal with no powers.

"Are you sure? I think you are a mortal."

"Then it must be so..." he mumbled, defeated now. His mind had been convinced he was mortal, then his mind had convinced his body likewise. Fairy Godmother held his hair in her hands and pulled upwards gently. She felt no resistance this time, the power in Simon's body draining from him into her. When she felt all of his power was gone, she looked down to see the mumbling old man the sprightly Simon had become. She scanned him once more to check for magical ability and found none. She stepped back and ended the glamour spell.

"Charming?"

"Yes mother?"

"This was a great sorcerer once. He should not suffer in death – make it quick." Charming nodded and raised his sword, sweeping it forward and decapitating Simon cleanly. Merryweather shuddered a little and felt sick, but the nausea past as she realised that Simon was finally defeated. "Come. I'll call Kyle to pick us up from the tower." Fairy Godmother walked out, Charming following her. Merryweather took one last look behind her at the body of the Great Sorcerer Simon, then closed the door and followed the other two. In the empty room, as the centuries caught up with the sorcerer who should have long since been dead, the body crumbled to dust.


	20. Business as usual

**Last chapter folks! Thanks for all your criticism and please keep it coming. Spunkeygirl160 - I tried to find your e-mail to say yes, there would be more, but I take it this chapter's presence is reply enough? ;-) And thanks Mandy of the Amoeba and Red and Gold Phoenix - and all the rest of you - for all of your support and encouragement. Oh, and while negative criticism is always appreciated (how else can one improve?), I'm sorry Shrekshlung but I think I'm too tall for it to be anatomically possible to grant your wish. Sorry!**

**Seriously, I hope you all had as much fun reading this as I did writing it. Love and peace to you all – may all your (nice) dreams come true.**

* * *

Kyle circled the tower and saw the three figures below him wave to attract his attention. He landed the carriage gently on the snow and jumped down to hold the door open for his passengers. Merryweather hopped into the carriage and Charming threw his arms around his mother, holding her tightly. Then he ran back into the tower, appearing moments later mounted on his white stallion. He drew level with the carriage.

"I'll see you back at the castle."

"Are you sure pumpkin? We could send the horse back by magic you know."

"No, it upset him last time." Charming stroked the horse's mane and smiled down at his mother. "Besides, someone has to guide all these people home."

"Where are they from?"

"Duloc. Apparently they still haven't found a replacement for Farquaad, so no-one will be out looking for them."

"Call me."

"Yes, mother." Charming raised the horse into an impressive stand, then reeled around and waited at the base of the tower for Simon's servants to appear. He nodded and smiled at Fairy Godmother as she gave him a final wave and flew into her carriage.

Merryweather peered out of the carriage window as it jolted into life and Kyle guided it home.

"He's very brave, your son."

"I know."

"It must have been hard for him."

"I expect so." An awkward silence fell inside the carriage.

"What was it like?" Merryweather looked at Fairy Godmother expectantly.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I follow."

"Being, well, dead."

"I don't wish to discuss the exact details. It was... empty. No light. No laughter. No singing, dancing, or hope. And certainly no love. But you keep your memories – so while there is nothing around you that you need or want and while you are completely alone, you can remember exactly what it was like to be with those you loved and to be where sunshine hit the flowers you used to ignore. It's the separation from everything you love that hurts the most."

"But wasn't that the point - it was Hell wasn't it?"

"Oh no Merryweather – that was just the waiting room before they decide where to place you. Hell was far worse. Far worse..." she drifted off and closed her eyes. Merryweather decided not to push her any further, but one question still played in her mind.

"Where do you think my sisters are?"

"Where do you think? They never did anything wrong. They were sweet and innocent and kind to everyone, even me. They won't be in Hell."

"Could you..." Merryweather stopped herself, then looked up at Fairy Godmother hopefully. "Could we bring them back?"

"We could, but I don't think we should. Resurrection is a risky business – Flora was very lucky she only brought me back with her and not something else from that dimension as well. The spell only worked because it had been decided already that I had been punished enough and was due a second chance."

"Who decided?" asked Merryweather, hoping for any information on the next life. In response, Fairy Godmother just laughed and raised an eyebrow coyly.

"If I told you that, I think I'd be in even more trouble. I was very relieved to be rescued from where I was – and to be given the choice through my actions in this life to decide where I will spend my eternity when I finally die. In contrast, it would be cruel to tear Flora and Fauna away from their reward."

"So you're saying no?"

"Yes. Obviously if we have another major emergency and we need their help to save the kingdom my opinion may change. But let them enjoy their afterlife – they earned it."

"I understand." Merryweather looked down at her hands in her lap. Fairy Godmother leaned over and held her hand gently.

"No you don't, not yet. I know what it's like to want someone back so badly but then to be told it can never happen. And it's doubly hard for you, knowing the means to bring your sisters back but being refused the opportunity to do so. But one day, you will understand." Merryweather sniffled a little at that and Fairy Godmother moved next to her and put an arm around her, letting the younger fairy weep onto her shoulder as their journey continued.

Kyle's eyes swept lazily over the ground as he flew, exhaustion creeping in and causing him to nod off as he guided the carriage. He soon woke up however, as a huge red dragon 'buzzed' the carriage. Just as Kyle was about to shout a warning, he saw a small grey donkey and a large green ogre on the dragon's back. Shrek made a signal to Kyle that indicated he should land and Kyle edged the carriage downwards in response.

Harold stood at the head of his army, foot tapping, glaring at the carriage door. After a few moments, the door swung open and Fairy Godmother and Merryweather jumped out, both with their hands folded in front of them. They flew up to the king and waited patiently for him to speak. To Harold's left, Lillian smiled as she saw that the fairies, while tired, were still alive and must have therefore succeeded in whatever they had planned.

"Well?" demanded Harold.

"Simon's dead, the cursed at the watchtower have returned to their former selves and Charming's alive. You could say we won." There was a cheer from the nearby soldiers, which grew to a roar as the news spread through the ranks.

"You can explain how later. We'll publish a royal proclamation tomorrow once we've decided how much to share with the public," said Lillian quietly.

"Thank you. Why the dragon?" Fairy Godmother looked up at the red beast towering over the carriage and at Kyle petting the animal on its nose.

"We thought she may come in useful." Harold looked up at Dragon, who was purring.

"Fair point," murmured Fairy Godmother.

"Well, I suppose we should all just go home!" Lillian linked her arm in Harold's and led him back to their horses, the army slowly turning and heading south.

Back in Far Far Away, the first snows of winter had just started to fall. As Shrek, Donkey, Harold and Lillian gathered in the Great Hall with Fairy Godmother and Merryweather, Fairy Godmother realised something was missing.

"Where's the cat?" she asked.

"Donkey stood on his paw and broke it, so he couldn't come to battle," answered Shrek, glaring at the clumsy Donkey.

"What? It was an accident. Besides, it was nice for the kids to have their usual babysitter." On cue, there was a jabbering of incoherent baby-hybrid voices from an adjacent room. Donkey's six offspring bounded into the room in the middle of some game. They were carrying Puss-in-Boots above their heads, cheering. Puss clearly hadn't seen the crowd in the hall and raised his arm above his head.

"Onward! We must storm the bastille!" The group of playing children suddenly saw their father and rushed over, lowering Puss in front of him. Puss looked a little embarrassed and saluted the royals. The six children fanned out around him, each saluting and brandishing a replica of Puss' rapier. The children smiled wide grins and raised their feathered hats to their father.

"So this was the great plan to calm the kids down then Puss?" said Shrek, grinning at the group of would-be Zorros in front of him.

"That's right signor! Already their training is coming along well."

"You're training my kids to be thieves and assassins?"

"Si!"

"Cool."

"Actually, I think they're more interested in being musketeers. All for one!" Puss raised his rapier with his right hand, leaning on his wooden crutch with his left. The six dragkeys raised their rapiers and knotted them together with Puss' sword at the tip.

"And one for all!" they squeaked.

"How sweet!" gasped Fiona, descending the stairs carefully. She hugged Shrek in greeting and clasped hands with her mother.

"Perhaps now everything can get back to normal!" Shrek sighed. "I think I've had just about enough surprises for one lifetime."

"Can you take just one more?" asked Fiona, cuddling him. Shrek looked blankly at her as she grinned, moving his hand to touch her slightly swollen belly. Shrek shook his head, still not understanding even as Harold spluttered and whispered furiously to Lillian. Finally, the penny dropped and Shrek grinned, hugged Fiona, then passed out.

"Yes, everything is back to normal," laughed Fiona.

A few days later, back at the potions factory, Fairy Godmother closed the ledger in front of her and sat back, rubbing her eyes wearily. She had finally made sense of how Charming had landed her company in such a mess and had formulated a plan to rescue her business. The only reward that she'd asked for was to be reinstated as the official Fairy Godmother, a request Harold and Lillian had agreed to, provided she didn't use the position for her own family's gain. Harold had also given FGM Inc. a large business loan to pay off the existing debts and buy new potion ingredients. At some point she would have to contact her old client base and start advertising that she was back in business. Charming had been invited to take over in Duloc as king, a position he would take up in a few weeks after spending some time with his mother.

Kyle walked into the office brandishing a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolates. Fairy Godmother smiled and waved a hand towards the bottle.

"What's the occasion?"

"I just dropped Charming off at your apartment and found these. We didn't get around to finishing them that night."

"I'm working."

"It's gone midnight." Kyle put the box of chocolates onto the desk in front of Fairy Godmother and looked at the champagne. "Warm, I'm afraid. I don't suppose you could oblige?" Fairy Godmother waved her wand and the champagne instantly chilled, two champagne flutes appearing on the desk.

"I suppose I'm due a break." Kyle popped the champagne and poured it slowly. Then he picked up a chocolate from the box and offered it to Fairy Godmother. He held the chocolate to her lips and she bit into it slowly. Kyle stole the other half of the chocolate, grinning as she furrowed her brow at him, unable to say anything as her mouth was full. He lifted his glass and toasted her.

"To you, Dama. May you remain as Fairy Godmother forever."

"Not forever. Just for a little while longer will do."

"If you insist." Both drank deeply, then looked back at each other. "Jerome put the crystal ball on answering machine before he left, there's no-one else here apart from us. We have alcohol and chocolate – will there be anything else ma'am?" Fairy Godmother raised an eyebrow and smiled.

* * *

**Il est finis**


End file.
